this post was submitted on 07 Jul 2025
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Battery is dead. Customer disservice can't run diagnostics software on it because it won't turn on because the battery is dead. They won't replace the battery because the battery is dead. That entire cult is a fucking farce.
If the battery is dead how can they turn it on to find out what the problem is? Literally an unsolvable problem.
I suppose in theory they could replace the battery and then see if that fixed the issue, and if it didn't then there's another issue, and then fix that issue, but all that seems like a lot of work.
Only a Genius could come up with a scheme that offloads the cost of their own laziness to the customer. Exactly the kind of innovation that Steve Jobs stood for.