This is fucking genius.
Love it
this post was submitted on 22 Apr 2025
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So is that “fuck” or “marry” for this one? Unless you mean “love to death,” in which case is this a “kill” for you?
I feel I'm missing something then. Anyone care to explain? (I know about the couch thing, that its his wife in the middle, and that the pope died after he visited him).
There is a game called “fuck, marry, kill” where you’re given a list of three people and you have to choose to fuck one, marry another, and kill the third. For example: Trump, Vance, and Putin… which would you choose to fuck, marry, or kill?
Ah I see. Thanks.
Answer the question!
I'll fuck, kill and then marry Vance.
always fun to see a bit of lighthearted necropsy
Interesting choice! It breaks the rules, obviously, but they're made to be broken.
I think you're sleeping on the marry/kill combo with two oligarchs on the list but I respect it anyways.
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This joke is in the context of the game fuck marry kill (I’ve also heard it as kiss kill marry)
Basically it’s a fun social game (highly dependent on your group) of who’d you have a one stand with, who’d be your better half, and who’d you’d erase from existence
TLDR, it’s from a social game
You're my favorite writer. Happy to see you're still alive!
I would nominate this for this year's meme awards.
That would be a fun thing to have. Monthly or whatever meme awards
Nobody thought about that earlier? We should do an instance about it or something. I'd do it, but after 2 years I still don't know how the fediverse works.
It's easy to set up. We could team up. I'll do the comm if you want to help put together the posts.
And we will call them Memys. You know, like Emmys, but with two letters switched. There should probably go a statuette with it, like the Emmy statuette but with the figure holding a well known meme. First that comes to mind is the doge dog, but that has been soiled. Got any ideas on that?
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I'm surprised I don't hear more about his wife.
Why don't we piss off his base more by mentioning his brown wife?
Because his true love is the couch. He actually killed the pope, because he wouldn't let him marry the couch.
vance was granted a one-time touch of death by thiel to use on the pope.
DEI wife.
Usha Vance to Kamala Harris: "See this babe, you can't get into the White House on your own. You gotta ride some hillbilly dick for that."
a hillbilly who has better makeup.
She's a beard. He's really Peter Theil's fuckboy, and everybody knows it, but they pretend they don't, so nobody wants to ask too many questions.
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noice
If the couch was brown the answers would be way different.
He's a homosectional
As if you guys would have made different choices
I'd marry the Pope, because the Pope marrying a guy would have hilarious fallout, kill the couch because recliners are superior, and... ahh, damn... guess I gotta take one for the team...
I respect these choices. Peak chaos shitposting energy
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Thank you for this!
What a pretty beard in the middle!
What's the couch story?
Just a joke because it's fun to call him a couch fucker. He never fucked any couches as far as we know.
....as far as we know.
He hasn't provided any evidence to the contrary, so technically he still fucks couches.
"Guilty even if proven innocent" IS standard US government policy now, after all!
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What's up with the white sofa?
He fucks a couch.
There are like so many real issues to raise outside of stupid sofa meme.
Raise real demands -
uhc - universal healthcare,
Laws Preventing capital fleeing abroad,
mandatory vacations,
Establishing us gdpr,
Banning crypto (only used for political bribes).
Building good social housing,
improving social security,
taxing corporations,
Nationalizing Ocean shores,
Nationalizing oil production,
Building nuclear power plants,
I don't care about the couch
If you really didn't care you wouldn't be writing a book in his defense.
Whose defence? R u high?
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