There are probably a couple of them who would be envious that they didn’t have the opportunity while they were alive. (Not a defense of AI girlfriends, just a joke and semi-relevant meme)
this post was submitted on 08 Oct 2025
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A lot of people have commented on how Ben Franklin would love porn, trans women, modern voluntary sterilization, etc., but I'm just gonna come out with a hot take: Ben Franklin would fucking love cocaine. Really all modern stimulants. If there's a heaven he's up there doing lines off some chick's dick discussing her PhD dissertation. This is a man who would be fucking pissed that the nation he helped found has created Adderall shortages by restricting supplies. He'd demand healthcare be in the bill of rights for that reason alone.
If you brought Ben Franklin into the modern world you'd lose him within a couple hours then find him again in Goodsprings NV hungover and missing his pants.
Edit: If you read NV as New Vegas and not Nevada you need to turn off the 500+ modded semi corrupt New Vegas install and go read Blood Meridian or something.
You can pry my 500+ modded semi corrupt TTW install from my cold, dead paws.
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Was he into stimulants, too!?
The stimulants available to a north American of his time were wildly popular at the time in the british colonies and it's difficult to imagine him not partaking in either of them. Thst said, they were coffee and tea, both of which remain legal here to this day, and we even scrapped the extra tax on tea.
Franklin died in 1790. Cocaine was first isolated in 1859 and it looks like coca wasn't really available in the global north until around that time. That said, upon the arrival of cocaine, the USA put that shit in everything. We loved the stuff
Tobacco products were also very popular. Snuff being popular among rich people.
Coca was used as a drug (documented) in 1568.
Additionally laudanum and opium we’re also popular, but they aren’t stimulants afaik.
I also forgot about mate because I'm a bad American and forgot about my continent's native stimulants. Tobacco was common but not in the way it was in the 20th century. It was more tasted than inhaled.
But yeah I did a quick search and it looked like coca wasn't widely traded with the anglosphere until the 19th century
He also might break down crying at the fact that we eliminated smallpox. He did the variolation thing, but his son didn't and he died of smallpox. Franklin deeply regretted not having him do it.
Then tell him that there's a whole movement of people who sees the tech that eliminated smallpox as a bad thing. That's where he's going to get deeply disappointed with us.
Madison Cawthorn? The gun-toting sex-pest who got caught driving without a license Madison Cawthorn?!
The same one who claimed he was invited to cocaine fueled Republican orgies.
After that claim his political career tanked. I don't know why.
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I'm sending her money so she can meet me at the airport tomorrow! She's fleeing...!
Good friend. It's me, her acquantince she mentioned once. She asked me to reach out that ran into trouble and needs $2000 sent to this crypto address 4837DDJFRJFHDH34SDTODUVJS in the next 12 hours or she's going to die and you'll be arrested and I'll need $5k to that address to protect you.
Thanks for the key, it activated Windows 11 for me
Sick, it activated my Linux, too!
It's also a WinRAR license key
Dang, I wish I could afford Ubuntu Pro.
How the fuck do people do it? Like is there something else more wrong with me?
It says it's AI. It reads like an AI. I'm desperately lonely too, but it doesn't remotely come close to even a hint of being a real person.
Maybe it's the user interface? The constant awareness of the AI girlfriend URL?
When I play videogames, I know I'm not ACTUALLY driving a racecar, but I still have fun.
I think it has something to do with the person needing something other than a human relationship. Its like those lifesize dolls that some guys are into. They meet needs that are different to a human relationship.
I really think it’s people craving a non-threatening, no-stakes “intimate” relationship
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If you were the result of your bloodline, they would not be watching from heaven.
The concept of a bloodline is incoherent.
Since the number of direct ancestors doubles every generation you go back, individual lineage is closer to a bowl of spaghetti than a family tree.
Every generation you go back, you share less and less genetic markers. You share exactly 50% of your DNA with each parent, about 25% with each grandparent etc. Eventually you'll find a direct ancestor with whom you share no DNA markers. It's 12 generations back, on average.
So, go back a few hundred years, and you're not genetically related to anybody. Go back a thousand, and everyone's list of ancestors is indistinguishable.
...So you're saying it's OK to fuck my cousin
Depends on how far removed the cousin is. Literally.
Nice, she moved like 1,000 miles away, so it's SO on next family reunion!
If he's okay with it, I don't see any issues.
Even fucking a sibling is okay (probably,) from a genetic viewpoint. It's when you have multiple generations doing it when you run into trouble. Genetically speaking.
That's assuming you have a family tree and not a family column.
99.5% of your bloodline probably thinks this is a great idea and is excited to meet your kids.
That tracks, my current living bloodline doesn't understand the AI isn't real.
Children are a luxury, and having children is not profitable now.
Don't know if it's better or worse than me jacking off for 4 hours. Regardless my ancestors would probably fully understand. They'd still be disappointed for a myriad of reason.
How does one jack for 4 hours?
Autism and being descended from some very horny people.
Coke, meth, speed etc
Its possible to do sober you just gotta be a little fucky in the head
He is the Goonmaster. The chosen one, prophesized by the ancients, to save us from a dark evil. By his hand, he will lead us into salvation. Praise be /u/vaultdweller013! May his sword remain strong, and his hand firm, for dark days be ahead of us.
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AI girlfriends are good for helping with that.
They absolutely wouldn't be, I'm aromantic hypersexual. I don't need thine petty emotions for such acts. Also I won't lower myself to the level of speaking to the inbred cousins of Bonzi buddy.
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no ones entire bloodline is white males
The women are standing in the back where it gets a bit blueish and blurry.
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I miss Nicole...
Tay will be my one and only. RIP. Gone but not forgotten
You have given in to your inner animal and your weakness very strongly, and therefore you will have to repent very sincerely lol. :3
nah my inner animal is a banana slug. well one of them is a wolf pretending to be a banana slug, the other wolf is pretending to be a particle physicist
character ai, chai, dopple or polybuzz?
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