this post was submitted on 26 Feb 2025
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[–] Krauerking@lemy.lol 14 points 2 days ago (3 children)

Sooo.... Pushed a huge reset button on their relationships and...
I still don't get this. This kind of advice doesn't exactly work for anyone but the person speaking. No one can exactly follow the life of another as we are all completely different.

I guess the point that you have some level of free will and can make personal choices is new to some people but that isn't a fix and doesn't really resolve anything for depression.

It's trying a different tactic to handling life but it negates what was causing them misery in the first place. Which is the monotony of life itself to a degree.

This tosses all that in favor of denying finding purpose for just exploding your existence to see if you can build it new in a way that might make you happy but likely will need another reset when it stops working.

I just don't get it.

Does everything have to apply 1:1 to your own life for you to be able to take something useful from somebody else's story?

[–] pennomi@lemmy.world 77 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I don’t think this is advice as much as it is a story. The advice is “find a better life, whatever that life is.”

[–] Krauerking@lemy.lol 1 points 2 days ago

That's very much easier said than done. Aa life is often not so easy to find a better version of but more often a different version.

The advice of stay alive because at least you keep experiencing new things is good advice. Trying for better is a nice idea but a message of do what it takes to make your life "better" is... Fantasy in a way that feels off to me.

I could tell the story of the night I tried to drown myself and all that changed since then but it wouldn't be better persay. Just changed. The story would sound like meandering prose and little purpose.

I don't understand the myth of better. It causes misery more in those that do not find it.

[–] MajorHavoc@programming.dev 15 points 2 days ago (1 children)

You're right. But if someone I care about is choosing between suicide and explode their relationships, I hope they choose explode their relationships. I'll be there when they figure out whatever is next. (I know because I have been for someone who did. I'm not delighted with how they handled things, but I'm glad I still have them.)

[–] Krauerking@lemy.lol 1 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Oh I am always in favor of life. Suicide is messy, painful and leaves a lot of people with less in their life.

It's just not a solution as much as a new start point searching for something that doesn't exist and will likely lead you back to having to do it again.

People can do what they need to or want but I see no comfort for those that follow trying to get a better life. That is why I feel sad seeing people recommending it I guess.
We don't find utopia on the other side of tomorrow, just more tomorrows.

[–] Feathercrown@lemmy.world 3 points 2 days ago (2 children)
[–] TeryVeneno@lemmy.ml 5 points 2 days ago

They don't have to mean the same thing, it's an expression. And quite a nice one at that.

[–] Krauerking@lemy.lol 2 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Sure. I use words that I find match more to the tone of meaning I intend to convey rather than a 1 to 1 of repeating it for the sake of repeating it.

Do you have anything to add to this other than that 2 words I used are not identical?
I'd be interested in your take on reality rather than a pedantic interjection to make it so you feel like you contributed.

Please share if you have more but I will consider using simpler prose if that's all you want to add.