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Either an egg meme or a neurodivergence meme. Or both in one. Preferably with the word 'non-binary' in it so that I'm exposed to that concept young. Then hopefully I'd get a clue and live my best life before that life turns into a dark tunnel where the only light ahead is an oncoming train.
Tempted to send it to my 5 year old self before starting primary school. But I mean, 5 year old me wouldn't get it. I could send it to 12 year old me before high school but then I'd still get sent to boarding school in a religious conservative shit hole town and probably feel even more trapped there armed with knowledge of who I really am.
So I'm gonna send to my 16 year old self. Second to last year of school when I was already done with this shit and just before starting my adult life.
I got diagnosed ADHD at 6, but never for the autism. Figured out I was enby around age 11 but I tried to tell myself it was just a fantasy and lived in envy of trans women, then almost 20 years went by before research started to show that hormone therapy is good for non-binary folks too.
I'd send this to myself at age 19, when I finally had enough freedom to start experimenting.
I didn't even know that "non-binary" was a thing until later in life. I knew that I wasn't like the boys but we wore uniforms and had to have gender specific haircuts and were all seperated and categorised, so it's not like I was spending all my time with the girls either. I just thought I was a weirdo that hated sports and stupid immature behaviour, who preferred reading fantasy and sci-fi books alone.
And I still didn't even know that it was a thing for years after school. We're kinda progressive in my country but probably still at least 10 years behind the first world in that regard. So it's something that I was just never exposed to. When I finally did sit down and do some homework about it, it felt like I had finally found the picture to use as reference to put the puzzle of my life together, if that makes sense. Before that, I was just building the puzzle blind and not doing a very good job at it. So many things in my life would've made more sense or been easier (and I would've made better decisions along the way too) if I had only known who I was.
This meme might've done the trick for me lol. Still gonna go with 16 though because that's the age I started sneaking out on weekends to go to the alternative club. I think that if I had a clue back then and wasn't still in denial, I would've done everything better, especially relationships with people.
Same, for real. My life would have been totally changed if I found the courage to start transitioning 20 years earlier.