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How do I politely turn down a teenage girl? (lemm.ee)

submitted 2 days ago by poisonapple@lemm.ee to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml

48 comments fedilink hide all child comments

(Yes, I’m aware of these bait-y titles.)

Anyway, I’m 23 years old. I live in my house with my wife. We have many teens in the neighborhood, which is good for my sister-in-law but one of them took a particular liking to me.

The girl and I just casually started talking when I would go for walks, for example. She then started acting really weird, like giggly or flushed. She told me she was bi but preferred women. I’m a lesbian.

Eventually, she confessed that she had feelings for me, though she knew I couldn’t return them. She has also told her friend (19F) that we are dating, when I told her this was not the case and I was married.

I am married and do not like this fourteen-year-old girl. How do I be respectful about not returning her feelings even if she knows I’m married?

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[–] Zak@lemmy.world 68 points 2 days ago

It is not impolite to say something like "I'm married, and even if I wasn't, you're underage. We are not dating, and we are not going to date."

She's being very inappropriate in this situation. That isn't really meant to be a harsh judgment of her because she's a kid and kids shouldn't be expected to how to behave yet, especially when they're very new to experiencing feelings of sexual or romantic attraction. Shutting her down firmly (but without any cruelty) will help her learn.