this post was submitted on 19 Oct 2025
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What is this thing?
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Personally, if I was a billionaire, I’d rather have a maid and groundskeeper than a hyperbaric chamber.
If I was a billionaire I’d shoot myself in the face as I’ve lost my way and should have stopped almost a billion a go.
If you were a billionaire you wouldn't have to choose. It's no longer "or," it's "and" for everything.
And a personal chef. Not having to cook everyday is a privilege.
If I had a chef they’d hate me.
“Chicken nuggets again sir?”
“Yes! And god help you if the dinosaurs aren’t recognizable again. What the hell are they teaching you up in France? Clearly not teaching about the Jurassic period! I will have your ass deported next time. Get it right!”
They aren't everywhere, but there are "meal prep" companies that work out of local commercial kitchens and deliver full weeks of meals to your home.
Not as cheap as making it from a scratch, but cheaper than hello fresh and others, and much cheaper than uber eats.
If I were a billionaire, I would have the hyperbaric chamber, but have it powered in the most ostentatious way imaginable. Instead of having a motorized pump to pressurize it, I'm just going to hire a whole bunch of people with bicycle pumps to pressurize the thing for me. I'll hire like a hundred people, pay them absurdly well for the task, and have a hundred people show up just to perform a simple task that could have been performed by a cheap motor.
Also, my primary mode of transportation will be sedan chair.
See, this is how trickle-down economics are supposed to work!
That was my first thought. For fucks sake pay someone to clean up!