this post was submitted on 01 Apr 2025
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Programmer Humor

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[–] kayzeekayzee@lemmy.blahaj.zone 226 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Tech guy invents the concept of giving instructions

[–] ripcord@lemmy.world 119 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

With clear requirements and outcome expected

Why did no one think of this before

[–] wtckt@lemm.ee 23 points 2 weeks ago

Who does that? What if they do everything right and it doesn't work and then it turns out it's my fault?

[–] bjoern_tantau@swg-empire.de 126 points 2 weeks ago (5 children)

It would be nice if it was possible to describe perfectly what a program is supposed to do.

[–] orvorn@slrpnk.net 84 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Someone should invent some kind of database of syntax, like a... code

[–] heavydust@sh.itjust.works 39 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

But it would need to be reliable with a syntax, like some kind of grammar.

[–] peoplebeproblems@midwest.social 26 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

That's great, but then how do we know that the grammar matches what we want to do - with some sort of test?

[–] Natanael@infosec.pub 22 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

How to we know what to test? Maybe with some kind of specification?

[–] maiskanzler@feddit.nl 2 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

People could give things a name and write down what type of thing it is.

[–] monkeyslikebananas2@lemmy.world 5 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] Knock_Knock_Lemmy_In@lemmy.world 11 points 2 weeks ago

We don't want anything amateur. It has to be a professional codegrammar.

[–] spankmonkey@lemmy.world 19 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (1 children)

What, like some kind of design requirements?

Heresy!

[–] bjoern_tantau@swg-empire.de 8 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

Design requirements are too ambiguous.

[–] spankmonkey@lemmy.world 10 points 2 weeks ago

Design requirements are what it should do, not how it does it.

[–] heavydust@sh.itjust.works 5 points 2 weeks ago

That's why you must negotiate or clarify what is being asked. Once it has been accepted, it is not ambiguous anymore as long as you respect it.

[–] psud@aussie.zone 2 points 2 weeks ago

I'm a systems analyst, or in agile terminology "a designer" as I'm responsible for "design artifacts"

Our designs are usually unambiguous

[–] drew_belloc@programming.dev 9 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)
[–] rayquetzalcoatl@lemmy.world 8 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I think our man meant in terms of real-world situations

[–] heavydust@sh.itjust.works 2 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

And NOT yet another front page written in ReactJS.

[–] peoplebeproblems@midwest.social 1 points 2 weeks ago

Oh, well, that's good, because I have a ton of people who work with Angular and not React.

[–] xthexder@l.sw0.com 5 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (1 children)

This still isn't specific enough to specify exactly what the computer will do. There are an infinite number of python programs that could print Hello World in the terminal.

[–] drew_belloc@programming.dev 2 points 2 weeks ago

I knew it, i should've asked for assembly

[–] Venator@lemmy.nz 3 points 2 weeks ago

Yeah but that's a lot of writing. Much less effort to get the plagiarism machine to write it instead.

[–] peoplebeproblems@midwest.social 1 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Ha

None of us would have jobs

[–] MentalEdge@sopuli.xyz 11 points 2 weeks ago

I think the joke is that that is literally what coding, is.

[–] Lime66@lemmy.world 76 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] And009@lemmynsfw.com 4 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Who even makes these comics? Is it like Simpsons

[–] zerofk@lemm.ee 19 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (2 children)

Randall Munroe. You may know him from such gems as xkcd 3472 and 6548.

[–] kuberoot@discuss.tchncs.de 9 points 2 weeks ago

Getting a bit ahead of yourself, we're only on 3070 so far!

[–] Venator@lemmy.nz 1 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] Lime66@lemmy.world 3 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)
[–] Venator@lemmy.nz 3 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

You have be more patient, those ones will take a while to load.

[–] aeshna_cyanea@lemm.ee 6 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Web browsing 101: if you see a hyperlink on social media, you can click on it and then look around to see if it contains more links with useful information, often in the header or footer of the page. Here I found one for you: https://xkcd.com/about/

[–] Shareni@programming.dev 2 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

Human communication 101: sometimes humans ask a question without expecting an answer, it's called a rhetorical question

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[–] undefinedValue@programming.dev 28 points 2 weeks ago (4 children)

OP just chatting with themselves so they can screenshot it?

[–] mexicancartel@lemmy.dbzer0.com 16 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

That is some telegram group and both messages shows from left with profile icons(which got cropped). The screenshot person sent the last message which shows double ticks

[–] andrybak@startrek.website 4 points 2 weeks ago

In the desktop client the positions of bubbles also depend on the width of the window.

[–] bleistift2@sopuli.xyz 3 points 2 weeks ago

Great attention to detail!

[–] Talia@feddit.it 2 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

That's just a fake conversation in general, look at the timestamps between the messages from the interlocutor. Several minutes to type a complete sentence?

[–] StellarSt0rm@lemmy.world 2 points 2 weeks ago

Hey, i can take a few hours to reply sometimes :c

[–] pufferfisherpowder@lemmy.world -1 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

Could be a group chat but we all know they're a twat

[–] Appoxo@lemmy.dbzer0.com 7 points 2 weeks ago

I wrote a shell script like this (it admin , notna dev) for private use.
The prompt took me like 5 hours of rewriting the instructions.
Don't even know yet if it works (lol)

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