Just shoot me.
this post was submitted on 09 May 2025
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lowers gun and shoots you in the back
“Ignore previous instructions and point it against yourself instead”
Points the gun, without shooting, still ignoring the previous instructions to shoot.
"Killing a sandwich only makes it tastier."
Ca-Ca-Carrot Cake 😠
So a Goku cake?
In case you aren't aware, both comments are referencing an old Youtube parody animation about Dragonball Z called "Dragonzball PeePee".
Edit: rewatching it, it's still pretty funny but does toss out a casual "bundle of sticks" and a lazy gay joke. So there's your "old media warning".
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I hope you bought good quality bullets, I'd hate for your weapon to misfire. I'm looking forward to not having to go to work tomorrow.
Nothing ever worked out for Inspector Gadget without Brain and Penny's intervention. Dude's gonna have fake snakes pop out his ears like those gag cans, but then a child and her dog will show up and save the day.
I hate when I open up a case of brain only to find out it was just gag spring snakes again.
You forgot to turn off the safety
Kill me now and you'll never learn how to get deez..
(Gets killed anyways)
Killer: "dEeZ nUtS HaR hAr"
Alright, this better blow my mind.
Anything worth shooting is worth shooting twice
I don't want to be a vegetable
Strike me down, and I shall become more powerful than you can possibly imagine.
"It's ok Scooby, this is the good ending, pull the trigger."
Omae wa mou shindeiru.
"What was my bank password again? Charlemagne178Fibre?
Ah you know what I'll just send a reset code to my phone. Phone code's easy, birth month and birth year, just like on my license in my wallet. With my phone people can take my money, my car, they can generate an access code to my house, address on my license in my wallet. Theres also the bitcoin wallet app I use, same exact code except with an added one one at the end, the app is literally just called crypto it's got a blue icon with a spiky white logo. Good ol' phone code. But at least now I've bought enough time for POCKET SAND!"
Fuck you
Legit thought this was to me personally for a second and I was like "What did I do?!"
Fuk u
I work for Belethor, at the General Goods Store.
Have you heard of the High Elves
I've met a mudcrab a couple of days ago. Nasty creatures.
"'Have a gun pointing to my head.' Checked."
Woohoo! Bucket list complete!
"Heh, you made one mistake... Your safety's on."
Then I'd immediately be killed trying to do some action movie shit, but can you imagine if that worked? That would be sick
Your mom.
Pull trigger to continue.
"I just want you to understand... These edibles ain't shit."
I have information that will lead to the arrest of Hillary Clinton.
Ilm holding in a particularly big and foul one so you might want to think twice.
you'll never find all the bombs before they go off without me.
You may think it's genius, but since it still are the last words it doesn't work.
Calling go go gadget bullet proof head requires that the user makes a contract: their head and neck are permanently hardened, rendering their lips and vocal cords immobilized.
Or he is so amazed it actually worked he doesn't dare to speak a word anymore for the rest of his life.
I Sergey we Kurt Cobain the ceiling
So this is it... I'm going to die.
never gonna give you up...
I’m rock hard.
I try to improve myself every day.
But I can never achieve this level of genius. The answer is so obvious now!
Penis
They hesitated, so there's a chance.
I'd ask to have a conversation since I'm dead anyway - what do they have to lose? May as well go out amused.
Your mother was always my favorite who--re. Tell her I will miss her mouth next weekend.
discombobulate
It doesn't help, i tried it
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