Programmer Humor

4 monitors & 2 compiters at my last job; 1 computer and 3 monitors at this job... 🎵movin' on up...🎵

Depends how lucky you are. There is a guy who works in upper management and he has the privilege to order new equipment for his office, which is all expenses paid by the company. He built a gaming computer complete with neon lights and four monitors right in his office.

"Honey, I will be late from work! I will be back at 3am!"

teabags scrumballs69 in Call of Duty

I have one monitor but it's really wide. What did that make me?

Its almost as if the more real work you do, the less you matter.

I wonder what would happen if the higher up in a company you get, the less you got payed. I'd imagine more actual work would be accomplished.

Executives are the ones that could easily be replaced by AI.

Middle management screens are used by everyone.

Here is the expendability graph

📉

If the guy with the "don't-turn-off"-server gets fired everyone know that the ship will sink

I can verify that this is correct.

I have 3 monitors, what am I?

CRT = cafeteria worker

and yet... if it's a company that's a bit slack on security, the right command in the right place by someone with 2 monitors can kill the company dead.

Compensation is inversely proportional to productivity.

Shit, I've got 4.

Kinda reminds me this Game one plays in Theatre which is to Play The Status (you're given a number between 1 and 10, with 1 having the lowest social status and 10 the highest, and you try and act as such a person).

Alongside the whole chin-down to chin-up thing, people tend to do more fast and confident moving the higher the status, but the reality is that whilst indeed up the scale in professional environment the higher the status the more busy and rushed they seem, the trully highest status people (the 10s) don't at all rush: as I put it back then (this was the UK) "the Queen doesn't rush because for everybody the right time for the Queen to be somewhere is when she's there, even it it's not actually so, hence she doesn't need to rush".

There was also some cartoon making the rounds many years ago about how people on a company looked depending on their social status, were you started with the unkept shabbily dressed homeless person that lived outside the vuilding, and as you went up the professional scale people got progressively more well dressed and into suits and such, and then all of a sudden a big switch, as the company owner at the top dressed as shabbily as the homeless person.

I must be some sub Spartacus worker. I have three monitors on my desk and two on the management network workstation behind me.

Apparently I'm off the end of the chart. My last workplace set up had:

• primary 15" laptop with two external monitors (so 3 screens in use simultaneously)
• secondary 15" laptop with external monitor (so another 2 screens) when the primary one was tied up doing heavy processing (I was lucky and managed to hold onto my previous laptop when we did the usual rounds of device upgrades whereas most people just returned them to IT to be retired, so I had a spare that I could readily take home for WFH days without messing with my main office setup)
• a standalone PC monitor (for automation stuff, so the screen was there just for monitoring as needed)

Importance, or lack of work contribution? Smaller screen = works less.

This is so accurate, it hurts.

Oh fuck, I have 5 27-32” monitors, phone, 2 laptops and a wall TV. Based on this I’m half fired already.