I got a DM to let me play a 3.5e ninja but lie to the party and tell them I was a bard.
this post was submitted on 19 Oct 2025
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A bard who is a wrestling jobber that pretends to get his ass kicked by the rest of the party so they look to bad ass to fuck with.
Throwing a "fight" to a party member is the most badass version of bardic inspiration I can think of
Okay DM, I'm going to snort a line and monologue for a few minutes to get the party pumped up.
Ultimate Warrior was... Yeah, I don't know how to finish that.
Cocaine is a helluva drug; the 'roids probably didn't help much either.
Happy cake day!
Oh hey I sort of unintentionally did the monk one! He was raised in a villain's cult that was was taken down by a party of adventurers. Since he was raised in it he fully believed in the cult's teachings until the shock of that day, and since then he had been trying to make up for it. I didn't use the religious aspect, but he had the aesthetic and the repentance, and also the party's druid had taken him on as an apprentice beer brewer so he even had that European monastic tradition down too
My first character was a half elf, arcane trickster, rogue that was deathly afraid of spiders. My dm was fun enough to work it into the campaign and had us go up against a giant spider hoard
The bard is a hick who wears overalls, is named Beauregard ("Beau" to his friends), and charms the underpants off of various people and creatures of all kinds with his unassuming and innocent, natural "aw shucks" charm.
Secretly, he's a perv from a big city putting on an act.
Depending on peasants’ lifespans in this world, the peasant with the midlife crisis could be just out of their teens
Nah. More like early thirties. Average life expectancy in the dark ages was 30 or something, but that's just because most people died very young, mostly as babies. If you managed to grow up at all, you could reach your 50s or 60s.
One in eight Commoners has 1 hp. I doubt they'd even make it to their teens.
Unless you're in the middle of a major plague or have a ridiculous amount of war, peasants in a medieval-style world who survive young childhood should generally get to an age of about 60. Though getting old with medieval-level medicine while working a physically demanding job probably sucks hard.
My wife is currently playing an asamar druid that was a drug dealer to the noble families of baldurs gate lol
I want this as a Dimension 20 series so bad.
Make D&D great again
Yo why this post out here hating on my boi 035?