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Supermarket evacuated after spider whose bite can cause erections or death spotted
(www.independent.co.uk)
That's the hardest working "or" I've ever seen.
this post was submitted on 13 Aug 2023
267 points (95.3% liked)
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Lmaooo. This got a genuine belly laugh out of me
At first it sounds like a helluva coin toss but in the end you end up with a stiff.
I hope you get to choose. One outcome seems better than the other.
I mean, the outcomes are not mutually exclusive.
Ah this is what happened to that old man in the first clerks movie
One of the best movies ever. So New Jersey.
Death by snu snu?
"I'm here to give out erections and death... and I'm all out of erections!"
I've got just the one. You can borrow it, in pulses
So what is it, like 50/50?
The question is, is it an exclusive or?
Those are odds I can work with
“the erection is a side effect that everybody who gets stung by this spider will experience along with the pain and discomfort”
🤷♀️
Imagine being a women... Do they get erections as well?
What part of "everybody" wasn't clear here?
Actually yeah, the clitoris.
how are masochists not breeding these things!
people eat ghost peppers. I wouldn't be surprised if someone tried this.
So... As an American do i have to order these online from Canada if I don't have a script?
No no it's female reproductive rights we limit in this country
Yes, but our insurance won't cover it and calling or visiting a site to a inquire will cost $5500.
Tried to kill myself like this once but the spider kept stiffing me.
Dead boner in Aisle 6, in Aisle 6!
It'll reopen after "comprehensive cleaning and disinfecting" in about a week... That's pretty quick for rebuilding a burnt down supermarket.
Though in all seriousness, I can't tell if the evacuation was an overreaction or if the decision to reopen after just cleaning and disinfecting is sweeping this under the rug. Seems to me like either they should have just warned customers there was a very venomous spider somewhere on the loose or made sure they caught/killed the spider before reopening. It's like they are treating a spider like covid back when we didn't understand how it transmitted.
Unless they are leaving the "we filled the supermarket with deadly poison to kill it" part out, which then makes the cleaning before reopening make sense.
Women who get bit: Guess I'll die 🤷♀️
"the erection is a side effect that everybody who gets stung by this spider will experience"
From the article, no escape women
Never heard of clitoris erections? The clitoris is just a tiny penis
The penis is just a big clitoris.
Meanwhile, hyenas
I'm not clicking that shit, thank you.
It's just a Wikipedia link OwO
Adding the extra spice with OwO
I am simply stating the trUwUth
By the time the fire brigade arrived at the store, the spider was nowhere to be seen, local media reported.
The fire brigade. I imagine them busting in. “Nobody move! It’s possible you may get an erection!”
Penis inspection day is now today!
I know none of you had time to prepare, as is your normal right, but get those dick out now
What a toss up of extremes
The spider is described as a small blue diamond and is often accompanied by older men.
Confirmed banana spider.
Obligatory Jibbers Crabst https://youtu.be/ZZ_BtZ-5O60
There are way too many species that are called banana spiders. That looks absolutely nothing like the banana spiders we had where I used to live (which were harmless).
~~cake~~ erection or death
I’m going for it
It’s a W either way
Delectable tea, or deadly poison?
I understood that reference.
Death Boner Live
I think death or erections are side effects of what the spiders bite actually does