Mouselemming

I can count to 20 with my eyes shut but my toes can't breathe with shoes on.

This sparks joy

Could you not just sit a little sponge on the warm top of the unit and add a drop of fragrance now and then?

Definitely but also grew stubble to widen his jaw relative to his ears

I'm not very good at math (but not an idiot like your example) and I wear flip-flops every day of the year but they're not related.

Are you trying to say something like "too dumb to tie shoelaces?"

Because there are quite a lot of lace-up open toe shoes and sandals, as well as closed toe shoes without laces, so that doesn't track.

The deep past https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/New_Math

Nazi Pedophiles

Just in case ICE comes to kidnap everyone, it would be nice if the bystanders wore extra clothes they could lend the nakies because it's cold in the KKKamps

I think they were trying to make a Tylenol joke, (that's acetaminophen) but ibuprofen is definitely not recommended during pregnancy.

For faster acting Motrin (ibuprofen) I have had good results from taking the kids liquid. Go easy on the dosage though, because it's easy to take too much. And switch to the grownup pills for subsequent doses, once the pain is manageable.

Oh, I think he'd hold out for fairly massive corporate kickbacks. He knows what they can afford.

Better than a suck-up like certain other governors

Worse, some of them are clearly thumbs.