Zhayl

Love me some WKUK! People watching is one of my favorite activities when I go out. With the hearing and all usually live in my own head while out in crowds. You can absolutely learn a lot about people by just watching their actions.

Glad to hear life is more clear for you. As you lose sense at a slow rate you easily forget what you have. Double good for people to remember these experiences as it helps dealing with other people that have similar issues.

I have plenty to be thankful for. Regardless how bad my issues seem I've seen far worse outcomes. I am just at the point where I have lost the energy and motivation to keep trying to improve my station. Short life has worn me down so much just roll with the punches and hope for the best. Don't compare your life to someone else though. Everyone experiences life to different degrees. Our struggles compared to previous generations is nothing.

Had head cancer at 15. These are the effects of the radiation. The whole head region tons of problems. Mentally no. Had a huge mental breakdown 5 years ago. The whole self-deleting isn't a matter if, but when for me to let you know how bad things are. I'm not a quitter though so I'll be around at least till my mother passes.

Your buddy sounds like an unsung hero! The difference between medical person treating you as a patient and caring for you is huge. Learning the technology and procedures that make all this work, truly a marvel of medical and engineering.

Tell him thank you for the work he does.

Thank you for the response. Living is US so healthcare is always expensive. That is a big concern is being on a limited budget now having been told for at least the first year there are therapy and learning sessions involved. That means for my decision it needs to be worth the money, time, and energy. So far I'm leaning to no and just living with what hearing I do have left.

The more you know! That was extremely enlightening so thank you for taking the time to respond and post the links.

Unfortunately I have no interaction with the deaf community and don't know anyone who signs. I had great hearing until the age of 15. Since then I've worked in technology so communication is usually with not as hard with quiet rooms and headphones. I've been informed by my medical team and read so much on what it can do. Looking for someone that has lived their life with a device that can give me a more day to day experience. Doctor's can't tell you how it feels going through a security check point and everyone eyeing you or what it is like processing end of the day taking the device off.

That is a rare thought pattern in my experience. Glad to see another light in an dim ocean of silliness.

Spot on! Not to be a hardass but you gotta have self respect and be aware of the basic red flags. Name calling, getting attitudes over little things, the slight hint of abuse, etc. If you see any of that male or female you should not "try" to make things work because they won't. Doesn't matter if it is two weeks in or six months in. When in doubt, nope the fuck out. Of course leaves you lonely but I'm much better off not putting yourself through such things.

In regards to the men who do strive to better themselves and to be a good person yet consistently find themselves single amidst the male loneliness epidemic, do the views in this article reinforce those men’s views that they are unchangeably a burden to others?

Before my mental breakdown and disability I was nearly all those things. But I rarely was given chances by women. Because I look a lot younger than I am? The autism effecting my social skills? The hearing disability making everything much more difficult? I'm at a loss what I did wrong for 20 years in the dating scene. Now I've just given up. I was always the "dependable one, always there when I need a hand, your like a brother to me, your just to sweet and I don't want to ruin our friendship" fml just say I'm not up to your standards.

On the flip I've seen how horrible my male friends and co-workers have been to their SO. Helped female friends get through or out of relations where there was abuse or tons of mistreatment. What I learned from those women is that they never learn. Go right back to the same type of guy thinking it will turn out differently. Now most are single mothers struggling to get by and make man-hating comments in front of me like I'm not part of the male population.

Imo it all boils down to people not knowing how to look at and address red flags. Social media has made things so much worse. Dating apps have ruined expectations and taken the social aspect out of dating. Dating apps for men is just a scam at this point unless you are rich or attractive. Nothing I said applies in all situations. But that is what I have seen occurring over the decades.

Holy smokes Batman! You described how I've been living my life. Not quite checked out yet but not all there. I want to be invested in life but it is like living as Sisyphus. But it can always be worse. Even when I feel checked out still try to remember all the things good in life I have.

Take this all with a grain of salt and ponder if any of this fits. It is not an attack but my observations and experiences from a cruel world.

Ahh but I am not attacking you. Again that is a mental issue you are instantly getting defense about and immediately saying something won't work. Because how I worded things you now think I am hostile towards you.

I do take issue with you saying because I broke up with my ideal person and we aren't alike for that very reason. Assuming so much from such a short sentence. For context I broke up with her because I am not the man that could provide a loving life style for her kid. I tried. I tried for 5 years to treat this kid as my own but he rejected me. The night I broke up with her she begged me to stay together, we could live separate when she had custody of her kid. Am I the asshole for breaking up? I gave her a chance to find someone else that may have better luck connecting to her kid. Spoiler she did find a guy that the kid at least tolerated and they've been happy together since. I'll go ahead and say I am probably more like your boyfriend in this scenario. Maybe he found something flawed in the relationship and he just wanted to let you off easy?

For context I am a deeply disturbed person myself. I have extreme levels of depression and I struggle to maintain friendships with some people that see differently than I. I'm stuck in my mental ways but I do go to a therapist and get outside assistance with my issues because I came to the realization that I am broken too. I can't handle my own mind on my own. I'm not proud that it took me several mental break downs to admit I can't finish this life alone. It isn't easy to talk about. The whole reason I even posted here is due to my therapist telling me to reach out to others more after my best friend killed himself with an OD last week.

So no this isn't an attack on your person. This is a warning that reality does not have any concern for you and if you cry yourself into a mental state about appeasing others. I'm terribly sorry if you fail to change that path yourself. There are tons of people willing to help, irl and online. We've been shaped by different life experiences and events. You will likely hear a lot of things you don't want to hear and those are likely the truth you need. Whether you consider what I've posted as help or an attack is up to you. But you asked.