Full Linux system requirements:
- Electricity: optional
- Processor: Ideal
- Blahaj: full sized ideal (smallhaj is ok)
- Socks: thigh highs
- Skirt: spinny
- Breast Mints (good girl juice): self explanatory
- Additional requirements: :3
this post was submitted on 03 May 2025
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I don't know what half those things are but I laughed at the words "Breast Mints". No idea what it means.
Like titty skittles but minty
Basically Fem&ms
It's like Antiboyotics.
Also anticistamines
It also has anti requirements, like not having an nvidia graphics card
Those work pretty well these days
Forgot a requirement: must be willing to RTFM. Other than that, it's still way less requirements.
Ok, but I have to ask, are we raging against the machine that is the system we live in, or the tower on our desktop?
ACKTUALLY they're on the verge of dropping i486 support. Fucking bullshit if you ask me. Now they expect us to upgrade our computers more often than once every 40 years? Homebrewers ARE JUST NOW figuring out how to diy i486 motherboard chipsets.
Next thing you know we'll need a 3090ti just to boot into Grub.
How can you run Linux without electricity?
A, e: very, large number of crabs
Potatoes.
Lots of potatoes.
You can run it on GLaDOS using only one potato!
That's actually the source of my joke haha.
You could compile gentoo on a rock.
the computer isnβt in the electricityβ¦
Even this potato with 512MB of RAM runs a bunch of linux web services without issue.
I feel old...when I was learning how to run Linux I started with an old 386 (maybe 486?) my dad wasn't using. I think it had 32MB RAM, which was fancy for those machines.
We had dial up at the time, so only one machine could be on the Internet. So, I set up a modem on the x86, plugged into an Ethernet hub (switch?), and learned enough ipchains (this was before iptables) to share a connection. It also ran Samba, an AFP server, and probably FTP and HTTP (just for local access)
but it worked for filesharing.
It could also run MP3 streaming software which amused me because the machine itself was too slow to decode MP3 (but that's not necessary to stream).
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electricity (optional)
I don't think that anyone's yet booted a Linux kernel on a purely-mechanical computer yet.
If you make a redstone PC and don't consider the requirements to run Minecraft... Probably (in-world it wouldn't be using electricity)
Technically possible. How large would such a machine be though...
It wouldn't need to be super large necessarily. It could just be very very slow.
Theoretically, an immortal person with many many stones that follows instructions very clearly could "emulate" (be) a computer, right?
Since you need 16 billion crabs to run Doom, I suspect easier than you think
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Ok just wait us Microsoft execs are going to pressure Trump to keep increasing tariffs on the penguins and when all of a sudden they need new suits for all the tween penguins ready to shed their adolescent coat we will see who comes out on top.
This is how you do business, penguins don't know how to do business and we won't let them have our AI so they can figure out how to either.
Trump tariffed penguins because he didn't understand what Microsoft was talking about.
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"I can't handle typing like this anymore" and "I like pickles" are two sentences I could make out of the blurry text
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The hard drive and monitor are broken, the fans are busted from experimentation with Half Life 2, but there will still always be
nethack
and
fortune | cowsay
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