One man's cum is another man's income
this post was submitted on 20 Jun 2025
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How do you fence 30k of cow spunk?
I don't know, but once I was flying business class and the guy next to me had a liquid-nitrogen flask full of prize-winning brahma bull spooge. According to the guy, couriers like that are well-compensated. Made my work seem meaningful in comparison.
Image the culprits, suspected to be fuck-goofs
Why is that guy red
He's shy.
He's a twiggy alien that's severely allergic to dogs
The barrel was probably mistaken for Nuclear Bloom
"Quick, spit it into this thermos!"
Do they plan to make Red Bull?
Prost Mahlzeit!
30 thousand euros worth? Where are they sold?
It's for personal use.
These guys were THIRSTY!
If only there was a vegan alternative.
you may not have any of my flower semen.
edit: no that's mean take a teensy piece
Veganism implies consent.
Do I need to spell it out for you how to get a load in a vegan way or can you figure it out?
Kinda looks like milk, so maybe they were thirsty?
Taking a bath in style
There are online marketplaces for it.
Other farms for insemination, my guess. I'd imagine they're for specific breeds.
The pedigrees of steers is a world unto itself. I've heard stories of people who were in the business getting wined and dined by governments. Bizarre but pretty interesting.
My milkshake brings all the bulls to the yard
How much volume is 30k of bull spunk? I'm thinking it must be at least a bucket full.
The official unit is bull-kkake.
Yes, about one ejaculate.
Did no one see this coming?
Is nothing sacred?
Why there are no movies about sperm bank robberies?
Probably because the actual plot would be nowhere near exciting enough to compensate for the draconian restrictions enforced by ratings agencies for daring to mention human reproduction 🤷
Wasn't that one plot point of Man of Steel?
There is Brassic episode about stealing bull sperm (although from a farm, not a bank).
I think it's S3e01
Creamy and delicious
New Jackass Episode???
Finally, bull milk!
What are you going to do with it @instantnudel@feddit.org?
Why me 😭
Well it's a little obvious don't you think? Who else would be able to handle this absurd amount of semen? Also what would an average person do with it? Exactly. Only a person that craves the seed like we crave for oxygen would do it. Somebody that literally breaths fresh life (because of semen)
Do you have any reason (or alibi) why it should not be you?