this post was submitted on 24 Jun 2025
453 points (98.7% liked)

Lemmy Shitpost

33162 readers
3491 users here now

Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


Rules:

1. Be Respectful


Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.

Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.

...


2. No Illegal Content


Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.

That means:

-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals

-No CSA content or Revenge Porn

-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)

...


3. No Spam


Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.

-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.

-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.

-No posting Scams/Advertisements/Phishing Links/IP Grabbers

-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.

...


4. No Porn/ExplicitContent


-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.

-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.

...


5. No Enciting Harassment,Brigading, Doxxing or Witch Hunts


-Do not Brigade other Communities

-No calls to action against other communities/users within Lemmy or outside of Lemmy.

-No Witch Hunts against users/communities.

-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.

...


6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.


-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.

-Content that might be distressing should be kept behind NSFW tags.

...

If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.


Also check out:

Partnered Communities:

1.Memes

2.Lemmy Review

3.Mildly Infuriating

4.Lemmy Be Wholesome

5.No Stupid Questions

6.You Should Know

7.Comedy Heaven

8.Credible Defense

9.Ten Forward

10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)


Reach out to

All communities included on the sidebar are to be made in compliance with the instance rules. Striker

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
 
top 36 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] whimsy@lemmy.zip 61 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Thank you for ruining broccoli

[–] ChicoSuave@lemmy.world 6 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] Event_Horizon@lemmy.world 3 points 2 weeks ago

Albino pubes

[–] SnokenKeekaGuard@lemmy.dbzer0.com 24 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Well most are pro pubes. The shaft has unrealised potential

[–] EpeeGnome@feddit.online 17 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

People think the stem is too tough, but it just needs to be cooked right. The trick is to start cooking the stem pieces first, then when they just start to be cooked, add the florets. Exact timing depends on the cooking method, but if done right all of it will be tender and tasty.

[–] vrojak@feddit.org 10 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I just eat the shaft raw as a crunchy snack while the pubes are cooking. It's great when dipped in some soy sauce.

[–] GreatRam@lemmy.world 1 points 2 weeks ago

Yep, we call them broccoli chips

[–] I_Fart_Glitter@lemmy.world 3 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

If you cut about .5cm off the outside of the stalk it's quite tender inside.

[–] Mouselemming@sh.itjust.works 2 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

Use your broccoli peeler going down the shaft from the pubes and don't forget to slice off the tip!

I'm a shaft preferer myself, it's sweeter and won't be hiding any bugs.

[–] Bosht@lemmy.world 2 points 2 weeks ago

I'm not sure why in the hell I never thought of this. I usually separate the tops from the stems, but cook everything together. Tops usually end up slightly burnt, shafts slightly undercooked. This may be a game changer for me! Thanks for the type up / suggestion!

[–] zarniwoop@lemmy.dbzer0.com 21 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

When I was a kid I’d just pluck the pubes off the broccoli and eat only those but as I got older I’ve learned to enjoy the whole shaft plus the pubes. Especially when they’ve had some heat and are black.

There ya go! The answer you didn’t want but got anyway.

[–] IndiBrony@lemmy.world 17 points 2 weeks ago

Confirmed: zarniwoop loves to shove warm black ones in their mouth all the way to the pubes.

Heh.

[–] DrPop@lemmy.world 10 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Roast the pubes and take a peeler to the shaft and slice them into chips. Olive oil salt pepper farlic powder and theow them in the oven to roast too. They are very sweet and underrated.

[–] AllHailTheSheep@sh.itjust.works 2 points 2 weeks ago

I'll try this, thanks

[–] PyroNeurosis@lemmy.blahaj.zone 8 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Thos're called florets. And they're delicious!

[–] peteypete420@sh.itjust.works 3 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Was shaft the correct term?

[–] PyroNeurosis@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 2 weeks ago

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[–] unphazed@lemmy.world 7 points 2 weeks ago

Cut it all into cubes, steam everything or fry it. Eat. Leaves, too if you grew it yourself. Just eat it. It'll give you the farts but it's all delicious.

[–] Owlboi@lemm.ee 7 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

for some reason i thought broccoli was some kind of metaphor for dong and was very confused what this post and its comments were actually talking about. but no its just broccoli.

It could be. If you like. Inclusivity is a virtue, i guess.

Which part of the penis do you like to fry and eat?

[–] mauuumauukittycat@piefed.blahaj.zone 6 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I prefer yorkshire pudding

[–] aeronmelon@lemmy.world 5 points 2 weeks ago

Now I don’t like any of it.

[–] peteypete420@sh.itjust.works 4 points 2 weeks ago

Pubes, but the shaft isnt bad assuming it was cooked.

[–] gofsckyourself@lemmy.world 4 points 2 weeks ago

Here's a new copy of this

[–] finitebanjo@lemmy.world 3 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

The stalk is mean to be cooked. The stems and florets are best rinsed, raw, and with a side of buttermilk ranch.

[–] Francois@lemmy.ca 3 points 2 weeks ago

Roast the pubes, soup the shafts.

[–] damdy@lemm.ee 3 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

The dog loves the shaft, it's be rude to deny him.

[–] I_Fart_Glitter@lemmy.world 2 points 2 weeks ago

Oh, but the gas....

[–] TheHotze@lemmy.world 3 points 2 weeks ago

I'm ace... I mean, I don't like broccoli. While, I'm actually ace too.

pubes more but shaft is good too

[–] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 2 points 2 weeks ago

I don't care for either unless it's covered in cheese.

[–] Etterra@discuss.online 2 points 2 weeks ago

The entire thing tastes like unwashed socks smell.