this post was submitted on 05 Aug 2025
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Lemmy Shitpost

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Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


Rules:

1. Be Respectful


Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.

Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.

...


2. No Illegal Content


Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.

That means:

-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals

-No CSA content or Revenge Porn

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Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.

-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.

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6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.


-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.

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If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.


Also check out:

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3.Mildly Infuriating

4.Lemmy Be Wholesome

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9.Ten Forward

10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)


Reach out to

All communities included on the sidebar are to be made in compliance with the instance rules. Striker

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top 50 comments
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[–] SassyRamen@lemmy.world 126 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

Without another man's dick in it πŸ‘€

[–] NoForwardslashS@sopuli.xyz 66 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

I didn't realise you had to specify this when ordering.

[–] InternetCitizen2@lemmy.world 29 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Its what made Starbucks standout back in 2003. Surprising people forgot. ^/s^

[–] NoForwardslashS@sopuli.xyz 22 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Missed opportunity to brand it Starcucks

[–] eager_eagle@lemmy.world 13 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I'll have the cuckaccino with extra milk

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[–] iii@mander.xyz 21 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Don't knock it until you've tried it!

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[–] socsa@piefed.social 17 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (5 children)

Which man's dick do you prefer in your coffee?

[–] SassyRamen@lemmy.world 12 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

My own honestly, I like the burning sensation

[–] errer@lemmy.world 22 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

CAFFEINE IS ABSORBED FASTEST THROUGH THE GLANS ASK ME HOW I KNOW

[–] tetris11@feddit.uk 7 points 2 weeks ago

If I do, can I get a different barista for my order?

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[–] Evil_Shrubbery@lemmy.zip 83 points 2 weeks ago (4 children)
[–] NichEherVielleicht@feddit.org 14 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)
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[–] interdimensionalmeme@lemmy.ml 11 points 2 weeks ago

I'm just struck by those incredible blue eyes
where even am I

[–] Denjin@feddit.uk 11 points 2 weeks ago

A curling gif? In the wild? Yay!

[–] Not_Dav3@lemmy.world 7 points 2 weeks ago

!antiquememesroadshow@lemmy.world

[–] sniggleboots@europe.pub 82 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Shipped from Colombia in a burlap sack.

[–] Randomgal@lemmy.ca 16 points 2 weeks ago

Jesus, talking to me at the pearly gates: "so you know that one joke about human trafficking by sniggleboots? Yeah man you caught for WAY too long, sorry pal. Eternal damnation it is for you."

[–] mr_satan@lemmy.zip 48 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

Is there a joke I don't get or is the joke that we are supposed to make our own jokes?

[–] wxpwn@lemmy.world 26 points 2 weeks ago

ground up and in the freezer

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[–] KraeuterRoy@feddit.org 46 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

"Black, Bitter, preferably Fair Trade" - Dr. Krieger

[–] NotASharkInAManSuit@lemmy.world 38 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Hot, bitter, and with little to no pubic hair.

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Microwaved because I forgot about them?

[–] Apocalypteroid@lemmy.world 33 points 2 weeks ago

Imported from a developing country in a burlap sack

[–] GrabtharsHammer@lemmy.world 27 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (1 children)

Ground up and in the freezer for freshness?

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[–] JubJubBird@sh.itjust.works 21 points 2 weeks ago

Dark and bitter?

[–] neons@lemmy.dbzer0.com 21 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
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[–] JasonDJ@lemmy.zip 18 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

Roasted, ground to a powder, and submerged 1-3 days in cold water?

[–] SnotFlickerman@lemmy.blahaj.zone 18 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] ummthatguy@lemmy.world 25 points 2 weeks ago

Alternatively...

[–] sundray@lemmus.org 17 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)
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[–] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 15 points 2 weeks ago

Acidic, full-bodied, pre-infused, and a little nutty.

[–] Flamekebab@piefed.social 15 points 2 weeks ago
[–] PennyRoyal@sh.itjust.works 15 points 2 weeks ago

Ground up and in my freezer?

[–] Bruncvik@lemmy.world 14 points 2 weeks ago

Strong and bitter.

[–] RememberTheApollo_@lemmy.world 14 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Dark and bitter?

Cheap and thin?

Cheap and tasteless?

White and sweet?

Full bodied and hot?

[–] BitchPeas@lemmy.world 16 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

Flat and white

Decaffeinated

With whipped cream on top

Single origin

With pumps of brown sugar

Warm....

Girl idk I think I'm just ordering.

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[–] iii@mander.xyz 12 points 2 weeks ago

Cold and moldy?

[–] yermaw@sh.itjust.works 11 points 2 weeks ago

Cheap and prepared by slaves?

[–] razorcandy@discuss.tchncs.de 11 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
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[–] zakobjoa@lemmy.world 10 points 2 weeks ago

Cheap and sour?

[–] hypnicjerk@lemmy.world 10 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)
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[–] vivalapivo@lemmy.today 10 points 2 weeks ago
[–] kryptonianCodeMonkey@lemmy.world 10 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

I bet gay men who don't like coffee love that joke.

[–] BudgetBandit@sh.itjust.works 10 points 2 weeks ago

You don’t like coffee, right?

[–] techt@lemmy.world 10 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
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[–] radiohead37@lemmy.world 9 points 2 weeks ago

Cold and bitter

[–] Valmond@lemmy.world 8 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

Restricted (ristretto).

Very very short.

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