this post was submitted on 27 Dec 2023
609 points (99.2% liked)

Lemmy Shitpost

28456 readers
3092 users here now

Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


Rules:

1. Be Respectful


Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.

Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.

...


2. No Illegal Content


Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.

That means:

-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals

-No CSA content or Revenge Porn

-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)

...


3. No Spam


Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.

-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.

-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.

-No posting Scams/Advertisements/Phishing Links/IP Grabbers

-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.

...


4. No Porn/ExplicitContent


-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.

-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.

...


5. No Enciting Harassment,Brigading, Doxxing or Witch Hunts


-Do not Brigade other Communities

-No calls to action against other communities/users within Lemmy or outside of Lemmy.

-No Witch Hunts against users/communities.

-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.

...


6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.


-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.

-Content that might be distressing should be kept behind NSFW tags.

...

If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.


Also check out:

Partnered Communities:

1.Memes

2.Lemmy Review

3.Mildly Infuriating

4.Lemmy Be Wholesome

5.No Stupid Questions

6.You Should Know

7.Comedy Heaven

8.Credible Defense

9.Ten Forward

10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)


Reach out to

All communities included on the sidebar are to be made in compliance with the instance rules. Striker

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
 
all 46 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] LinkOpensChest_wav@lemmy.dbzer0.com 92 points 1 year ago (1 children)

It's crucial that you walk in without fear, because the animals can smell fear and will devour you

[–] Honytawk@lemmy.zip 45 points 1 year ago (2 children)
[–] LinkOpensChest_wav@lemmy.dbzer0.com 20 points 1 year ago (1 children)

The store clerks are actually flocks of parrots in trenchcoats

[–] Agent641@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Man-eating parrots wrote this sign.

Have the carnivorous parrots of New Zealand ever eaten a man? Like I presume that theyve tried, I know for a fact theyll go after sheep.

[–] jopepa@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

lol and is your real name anythony but you go by Hony?

[–] Aremel@lemmy.world 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I think it's a spin on the name Tony Hawk, a famous skateboarder.

[–] jopepa@lemmy.world 7 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Of the Tony Hawk Pro Skater 2 Fortune?

[–] Aremel@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] variants@possumpat.io 2 points 1 year ago

And nofx's punk in drublic?

[–] MrsDoyle@lemmy.world 36 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I actually knew someone who died of that parrot disease. Psittacosis? He caught it off a budgie.

Here it is: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Psittacosis

[–] EfreetSK@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (3 children)

Holy moly, and I was thinking about buying a parrot to my daughter ...

[–] RubberElectrons@lemmy.world 9 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

You can rescue some as I have. Birds are very unique and fun, but fragile and want as much love as they give (which is a lot).

I have two conures, one was "too loud" and ignored in the corner of their garage for a few years until he started pulling out all his feathers and chewing off one of his toes, at which point he was donated.

It took about a month to get him to trust me. He will not stop attacking his own feathers, but now does so in a relaxed, quiet way while on my shoulders. He loves to just hang out with me while I'm doing some design work or programming, calling from the open door of his cage in a certain way when he wants to shoulder surf. He's afraid of everyone else, but I know him, his body language tells me that he likes being around me.

They are a unique gift in terms of a life form. I wouldn't buy one. Go for a rescue, try to sense their personalities as you talk to them.

[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 7 points 1 year ago (3 children)

There's a better reason not to do that. They can live over 70 years.

[–] nevemsenki@lemmy.world 5 points 1 year ago

Depends on the bird type. Budgies live for about 7-15 years, for example.

[–] yamanii@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (2 children)

I thought people wanted their pets to live as long them?

[–] WeirdGoesPro@lemmy.dbzer0.com 8 points 1 year ago

Within reason. Long lived animals can get the same sort of neurological diseases that humans do, but without the advantage of language and healthcare.

It’s bad enough when Nana goes senile, but it’s even worse when all she can do is screech, claw, and bite at you, and there are no teams of professionals to help. That’s life with an elderly parrot.

[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 5 points 1 year ago

That is a pet that has a good chance of outliving you. If you have to will your pet to someone else, you probably shouldn't get that pet. The same reason why I told my 80-year-old mother not to get a dog. She didn't listen to me. At least she didn't will the dog to me.

[–] NeuronautML@lemmy.ml 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Honestly i always found it cruel to own a bird as a pet. Birds are meant to fly. All bird owners just either keep their birds in a cage or chained up all the time. They never get to fly their whole lives, or they'd fly away. Imagine being born with your upper limbs with the purpose of flying and never doing it because someone needs a pet bird.

[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago

I agree 100%. I would never get a bird as a pet for this reason. I have a huge yard for my dogs to run around in and a dog door so they can go out any time they like. The only kind of bird you could do that with is a bird of prey that you've trained to do falconry with, and even then only for a limited amount of time.

[–] LuckyBoy@lemmy.world 5 points 1 year ago

Dont, they cling to one owner, they live a lot of time and they need a lot of socialization. Its not a humane pet to have.

[–] modifier@lemmy.ca 29 points 1 year ago (4 children)

Parrots were about 6 or 7X their current size back in those days, so it was irresponsible for this shop to have ever hosted them.

[–] MashedTech@lemmy.world 15 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] Rusty@lemmy.ca 19 points 1 year ago (1 children)

PARROTS WERE ABOUT 6 OR 7X THEIR CURRENT SIZE BACK IN THOSE DAYS, SO IT WAS IRRESPONSIBLE FOR THIS SHOP TO HAVE EVER HOSTED THEM.

[–] coffeeaddict@lemm.ee 2 points 1 year ago

Sorry, can't hear you.

[–] Sway_Chameleon@lemmy.world 14 points 1 year ago

Suddenly, there was a terrible roar all around us, and the sky was full of what looked like huge ~~bats~~ parrots, all swooping and screeching and diving around the car, and a voice was screaming: "Holy Jesus. What are these goddamn animals?"

Fear and Loathing in the Pet Store.

[–] Smoogs@lemmy.world 6 points 1 year ago

I think you may have eaten one too many gummies

[–] bonezey@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Thanks. Was about to ask because I did not get it and thought it's an US thing.

[–] Someone64@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I hope you’re joking but if you’re not, it’s not true.

[–] bonezey@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] RickyRigatoni@lemmy.ml 1 points 1 year ago

Because you're a funny guy :)

[–] Rocketpoweredgorilla@lemmy.ca 20 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] niktemadur@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

A palindrome of Bolton is Notlob, it don't work, mate.

[–] basxto@discuss.tchncs.de 1 points 1 year ago

That’s "emergency praise" in German.

[–] owenfromcanada@lemmy.world 13 points 1 year ago (2 children)

What's a guy gotta do to get himself a Norwegian Blue?

[–] ikidd@lemmy.world 12 points 1 year ago

'E's not pinin'! 'E's passed on! This parrot is no more! He has ceased to be! 'E's expired and gone to meet 'is maker! 'E's a stiff! Bereft of life, 'e rests in peace! If you hadn't nailed 'im to the perch 'e'd be pushing up the daisies! 'Is metabolic processes are now 'istory! 'E's off the twig! 'E's kicked the bucket, 'e's shuffled off 'is mortal coil, run down the curtain and joined the bleedin' choir invisible!! THIS IS AN EX-PARROT!!

[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 7 points 1 year ago

Beautiful plumage!

[–] rob_t_firefly@lemmy.world 12 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] variants@possumpat.io 3 points 1 year ago

I recently watched a documentary about the bird attack on Bodega Bay

[–] Mango@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago