SARGE

Look, if you want to wrangle with a bear to try and get that pelt, you go right ahead.

I've had enough suffering in my lifetimes, I'm hunkering down and waiting for the department of temporal investigations to show up and take me home.

Besides, you need at least 3μg of pergium, which I'm sure I don't have to remind anyone is not native to the solar system.

Not programming, but in the same vein, A Trek Bicycle store manager asked me in an interview if I would be willing to work a trial shift the next day building bicycles. Unpaid, of course. Just to see if I was a good fit.

Of course, since I was used to building 50 a day, I would have gotten all of them done in a single shift whereas they were needing to call in stores from surrounding areas to come help in a few days.

I laughed and said if they needed help tomorrow I would be happy to work for my usual fee of $20/bike.

Oddly, I did not get the job

Unfortunately due to some temporal shenanigans, I'm stuck here without so much as a self-sealing stem bolt.

No transporter system.

Besides, why would I want to wipe my pattern buffer ~~prisoners~~ ~~guests~~ experiments?

There's 1,000 jokes that can be made in sure, but in the US I once found a grenade while magnet fishing and called a guy my parents know who is a cop. The moment I realized what it was, I told my friend to run to the end of the bridge, and I gently laid it on the pile of rope I was using.

They have a whole bomb squad that's about 30 minutes away at full speed, and they rolled up with their trailer, a guy in a suit came over to the bridge and placed it in a box, put the box in the trailer, and one dull THUNK later all I had to do was sign a paper saying this is where I found it.

I specifically called my parents friend rather than 911 because I had read too many accounts of cops showing up and attempting to arrest the magnet fisher for any number of reasons.

UXO is no fucking joke, don't for a second think you can handle it without training. You really have no idea what explosive compound they used or what it's stability level is after being exposed to the elements.

You're splitting hairs.

I've legitimately tried that, even tried no alarm at all.

The no alarm is a bad idea just because every so often I just sleep right on through, if I've had a particularly harsh day.

I think my brain just goes "you sneaky fuck, I know you REALLY want to get up at 7 so we are getting up at 630ishjust to be sure."

Any questionable software I have is coming up on 4 years old now, most of it is older than that. I move them to a new machine every time I upgrade, simply because I don't trust torrents anymore.

Honestly, I don't trust PDFs anymore unless they're from places I know are "safe" which kind of sucks because I've been getting back into RC as a hobby and it's hard to find non-pdf plans. I prefer vector files, but I'm having to try my luck with jpg and png files.

A lot of the programs I used to use have been surpassed by current FOSS projects, and I've been replacing them as I can. Finding an open source laser engraver program that isn't shit is proving difficult.

Addicts always gotta justify how they get their fix, I guess.

I don't need an alarm.

I wake up every few hours regardless.

And I'm always awake about 20 minutes before my alarm, no matter that time I set it to.

Existence is pain

I'm not sure how Canada feels about a foreign legion, but I'm willing to volunteer.

Note: this applies to any country the Orange Jackass threatens to invade.

But like.... Organize first.

Otherwise you're just a crazed lone gunman dead in the street.

I'm starting to think "Fascinating" is the universal translator's attempt at censoring Vulcans.

Its basically what all of them say when what they should probably be saying is "What the actual fuck is wrong with you?"

Sidenote: I absolutely cracked up in the episode of strange new worlds where Spock