We're often caregivers, rescuers, and support others. Who here has got stuck trying to fix someone?
this post was submitted on 26 Jun 2025
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20 years of riding the carousel of "if only he'd stop drinking". Hopefully we can purge "fixing the broken person who then becomes our one true love" from our collective narratives. His choice of drinking doesn't make him a bad person in need of fixing. My choice of leaving him doesn't make me a bad person. It's just that we use different coping mechanisms that don't align.
When I encounter residues of the "fix him" narrative in my mind I just imagine it the other way around: I'd be so annoyed if somebody tried to fix me, I want to have the freedom to make my own mistakes in my own time, not be rushed into a 'more enlightened' version of myself by some shiny savior!
You showing him that kindness says good things about you. I agree it's a narrative that needs purging!