this post was submitted on 13 Jul 2025
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WomensStuff

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Trust your gut instinct ALWAYS (reddthat.com)
submitted 2 weeks ago by LadyButterfly@reddthat.com to c/womensstuff@piefed.blahaj.zone
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[–] gift_of_gab@lemmy.world 11 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (2 children)

You came onto a sub-lemmy about women in a post about women and burst out with:

But that does not invalidate mens rights.

Who the fuck said it does? Look, I lived as a man for longer than you've been alive, and this is the perfect example of male privilege. You think you have not just the option to but obligation to insert male issues into a squarely labelled area set up for women.

As a man I was mugged twice in over 40 years, and got into a few dozen fights in elementary and highschool -- each and every time to a boy/man. Then I came out as enby and was immediately inundated with fun experiences like:

  • Being followed home
  • Being physically touched and then apologized to because "whoops you're a guy" (because it would have been fine if I weren't?)
  • Being cat called
  • Being told I could be raped because how I was dressed was 'asking for it' (I had a tank top and shorts on, not that it matters)
  • Told by a man that 'well, men do that' (about most of the above experiences)

If you want to bring up issues men have, there are dozens of places for that. A place set up for women to talk about women's issues is not only not the place, it makes all of us AMAB's look fucking worse. Part of the reason I came out as non-binary and not just a femme-y man is because people like you make me feel so alienated from men I can't imagine being one.

[–] Boomkop3@reddthat.com 2 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (1 children)

I've heard of people in America not even daring to use a shared gender bathroom because of mens behaviour where they lived. I know some places suck. Yes, this is just one example, there is more. Way too much more

This is the first time someone put words in my mouth in a discussion on equality. As to your question: that was you

[–] gift_of_gab@lemmy.world 7 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I’ve heard of people in America not even daring to use a shared gender bathroom because of mens behaviour where they lived. I know some places suck.

Je suis Canadienne.

This is the first time someone put words in my mouth in a discussion on equality.

_You're in a women's forum talking about women's issues and your first comment was an attempt to invalidate the entire discussion by saying:

Isn’t that true for any gender?

No. Women talking about issues women face isn't true of any gender - similarities can exist yet are separate because they are different groups that have different experiences and realities.

You walked in here and tried to derail commiseration into a vague debate that holds no water.

[–] Boomkop3@reddthat.com 3 points 2 weeks ago

I was about to make a snarky comment you'd repeat this kinda rethoric, probz should've

[–] ZDL@lazysoci.al 1 points 2 weeks ago

Told by a man that 'well, men do that' (about most of the above experiences)

You know what has never happened to me here in China?

  • being followed home
  • being physically touched outside of the usual jostling in crowds, etc.
  • being cat called
  • being threatened with rape

So it seems that "men do that" is a bit more specific. Perhaps "western men do that" or "American men do that" is more on point.