1) Be nice and; have fun
Doxxing, trolling, sealioning, racism, and toxicity are not welcomed in AskLemmy. Remember what your mother said: if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all. In addition, the site-wide Lemmy.world terms of service also apply here. Please familiarize yourself with them
2) All posts must end with a '?'
This is sort of like Jeopardy. Please phrase all post titles in the form of a proper question ending with ?
3) No spam
Please do not flood the community with nonsense. Actual suspected spammers will be banned on site. No astroturfing.
4) NSFW is okay, within reason
Just remember to tag posts with either a content warning or a [NSFW] tag. Overtly sexual posts are not allowed, please direct them to either !asklemmyafterdark@lemmy.world or !asklemmynsfw@lemmynsfw.com.
NSFW comments should be restricted to posts tagged [NSFW].
5) This is not a support community.
It is not a place for 'how do I?', type questions.
If you have any questions regarding the site itself or would like to report a community, please direct them to Lemmy.world Support or email info@lemmy.world. For other questions check our partnered communities list, or use the search function.
6) No US Politics.
Please don't post about current US Politics. If you need to do this, try !politicaldiscussion@lemmy.world or !askusa@discuss.online
Reminder: The terms of service apply here too.
Logo design credit goes to: tubbadu
I'm guessing you're a man ?
I'm 5'4 male and average looking and a bit chubby
Dude, if you have decent hygiene, are a basic human being and treat people with respect, you will rise above all the other men who are stupid, racist, sexist, entitled pieces of shit
The bar is set REALLY low
Really Really low
Also if someone rejects you for your height consider he/she is doing you a favor by signaling he/she is not mature / has fucked up priorities for a relationship
This absolutely. I'm a 5'1" lady, and I do like my partner to be taller than me, but basically everyone is taller than me.
If you lined up every man I've dated over my lifetime, you'd see men from 5'2" to 6'4".
The right people are there for the person, not shallow bullshit. Hygiene is the best indicator, yes. Good hygiene, nice person, you'll find success.
When my now husband told me he was 6'3" my jaw dropped. Sure I was happy (he can reach the top shelf for me) but I seriously wouldn't have batted an eye if he was shorter
Date kind people, not shallow cunts and you should be okay.
I dated one guy who told me he was 5'10". He was kind of a cunt. He was actually 5'7". It just showcased his insecurity. I didn't like that. Wear yourself with pride. No one choses to be short/tall. Accept yourself and others will too.
The bar is set REALLY low
There's a saying "the bar for men is in hell"
I thought it meant there was a drinking establishment for men in hell. They go and drink with the devil, and that's where they get all their bad ideas. They're doing shots and the devil's like "say she's fat", and the guy is like "good advice bro".
Turns out the saying just means the bar is super low. So low you don't even have to jump. It's so low, it's deeper than the depths of the earth and in the fires of hell that burn below.
But yeah, so many men are so horrible, it's shockingly easy to rise above them.
People do get rejected for their height lol, ppl are shallow, all woman aren't saints, what you should be saying is you should avoid anyone that cares about height, theyll remove themselves and its a non issue, ive had girls attracted to me calling me 6 foot be less atteacted to me visibly when I corrected them and said im actually 5 10 no logic in it lol
Lol ok I feel dumb after looking at the comments. I thought you meant like... On rollercoaster rides or something.
lol you and me both
Is that a problem I'm too tall to understand?
Being 205cm (6'9"), yeah what kinda problem is that? Now let me go tend to the bump on my head from running into a doorframe again
Fuck that, how expensive are your shoes?
it's fine I only have a 47 (13.5) so I can still buy them in regular stores. usually around 50€ if it is everyday wear1
Laughs in back and knee pain
Regularly throughout my life. I'm also 5'7". It seems to be less of an issue now that I'm older. People are going to like what they like. But people who limit their choices to strict deterministic traits tend to completely skip right over awesome people, and then they wonder why they're partners are so terrible.
So yeah, this shit is going to happen. You'll also get chosen for your height. Focus on improving those physical traits over which you have control.
My ex did tell me I'm shorter than she wants her bf to be. I was still talker than her by 2-3 inch but she wanted me taller than her in heels. And suggested I do exercises to get taller.
I ended it with her soon after that. I think if someone has thought like that, there are other common patterns that makes the relationship too much to worth it. My wife now is same height as me and we're happy about that, height difference of several inches seems weird/difficult to imagine now.
ive never Been rejected, (i dont ASK people out)
Same, I just awkwardly glance at them few times of I like them and hope they will ask me out. So far nobody asked me out.
That's the spirit!
I (woman, 5'10") was dumped for being too tall.
Rowing club coach at a university I was interested in told me I was too short to bother trying out but if I dropped all muscle to squeak under 120 lbs I could try for coxswain.
Jokes on them, rowing generally requires waking up before the ass crack of dawn which was not conducive to my preferred college experience. I found rugby, which has way broader allowance for body type and no sunrise torture sessions.
I am 5'4" and though no one has ever outright told me they rejected me because of it directly, it almost certainly is a leading reason I have fewer interested parties. It seems like most women specifically mention height in their requirements. It's too bad, I'd date a tall woman. Karlach is my favorite.
Being short helped me grow a personality and learn to be charismatic to overcome my height, and I've done okay, but it'd be foolish to say it's not a huge hurdle in dating.
No. I have doubts that it actually happens except in extremely rare instances. I wonder if some women blame a lack of attraction on height because saying other things gets an ever worse reaction?
Possibly.
Not particularly tall but have had someone mention liking it. Mainly just kissing up.
It's not gonna really matter for someone who is into you.
Not to my face. But as someone else said, it's rare for you to be told the rejection reason (for early dating). There are a lot of reasons for this, but part of it is people kind of suck at taking rejection. And on top of that, a significant portion of men are dangerous.
No one wants to risk the man flipping out, spewing cruelty, or worse. A gentler letdown seems safer.
I lucked out into being born 5'10, not tall enough to need special clothes, but short enough so the shallow "6ft or nothing" women self filter themselves and I don't have to deal with them myself. I had a buddy who was 5'4ish who was an absolute disgusting human being but always blamed being alone on his height, also have a buddy who 5'2ish and married to an absolutely wonderful woman
I lucked out into being born 5'10,
RIP mom
I can't ride the go karts at the nearby go kart track because I am too tall 😔
I'm 5ft11 and I think I just get rejected for being myself rather than my height 🤷🏼♂️
Yes. Rejected to ride on the adult-sized go karts. Has to ride the kiddie bumper cars instead. But this was when I was younger.
I'm 5'8, plenty of men aren't interested in women as tall as they are.
About 10% of women will have a very strict type and reject you outright. If you were 2m tall this would maybe shrink to 9%, so it's irrelevant.
90% will think maybe you're a bit short but will overlook your height if you're above average in some other area of personality or looks.
My favorite height in a woman is the height of the woman who is interested in me.
Yes. I am 1,70 and got rejected for being too small. Well. It happens.
Reading the thread. Most of you guys are not THAT short lol. I actually married my guy who is 5'1". He has a nice smile, funny and smart.
He has told me unfortunately that he has often been declined often by women due to his height. We have asked our mutual friends who said they won't date someone who is that short which is unfortunate because they all love him too.
He's pretty confident, professional, so people from work finally meet him in person, they are surprised he is not taller.
I'm too tall for that. But on a lot of dates i go, the woman tells me that she's glad i'm tall and then tell me a story how they went on a date with a short guy and how awkward that was.
I tell people I'm 4'23" and that sorts them out.
This whole height thing is an artifact of dating apps.
Of course women are going to judge based on one of the 6 data points they have available. It's not that they're shallow by "nature".
Women will almost never confront a man face-to-face with the reason she rejects him because to do so is physically dangerous.
I saw a meme on reddit today that suggested that an obese woman could have all the partners she wanted and that only men suffered from being rejected because of their body and this incel shit is gotten out of hand.
EDIT: here is the meme: https://i.redd.it/yyp4m7axn25f1.jpeg
Do you think they realize that they made her look fun (smiling) and him look awful (scowling, wearing a school child backpack, bad haircut) ?
I was once rejected for being too tall. I'm 1.96m (~6'5") and she was ~ 1.65m (~5'5"), said that she didn't like the thought of having to crane her neck to see my face.
Yes, he said he didn't like feeling like a kid next to me 🤷♀️
Yes, too tall. I'm 6ft without any kind of footwear. 🤷🏿♀️
No. I got married before online dating existed
