this post was submitted on 19 Oct 2025
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[–] ThunderQueen@lemmy.world 11 points 3 days ago

There is a reason that Grindr crashes whenever the GOP comes to town

[–] yakko@feddit.uk 150 points 5 days ago (3 children)

I've become increasingly preoccupied with the idea that dudes in denial about their sexuality are actually the most dangerous people in the world

[–] Krudler@lemmy.world 75 points 5 days ago (13 children)

I completely agree and I have personal experiences to back that up

I feel like men who have not been allowed to explore their sexuality in a safe way become extremely angry, frustrated, and dangerous

That's why I feel like homophobia is something that should be less reviled, and more looked at as a trauma inflicted on the homophobe

This comes from somebody who works in social services, and I myself am non-binary. I know it's hard to look at the hate that comes from homophobia with compassion, but I feel like it's necessary in order for society to heal from it

[–] MBM@lemmings.world 20 points 5 days ago

Beware the trap of saying straight people can't be homophobic

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[–] prettybunnys@piefed.social 16 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Anyone who has to hide a core part of who they are is automatically at a disadvantage from a “basic survival” standpoint.

It pits you against yourself and against the world.

grew up in a cult, can confirm.

[–] Noise7@lemmy.world 27 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago) (2 children)

I see where you’re coming from. I had the same thought a couple of times.

I still feel there are tons of miserable closeted people that wouldn’t hurt a fly, though, so I think it’s probably at best an extreme minority.

I can’t shake the strange feeling that love is in fact a resources that is very scarce. And that with enough love for every human being at all times, a huge majority of humanity’s problems would simply disappear.

There are a certain percent of people who simply can’t love, or be loved, though. Those would need to be treated as persons with special needs, but also, kinda on a watchlist.

Sadly, there’s currently no way for every human to feel the huge amount of love they’d need. Because of social rules, of the natural mammal tendency to exert sexual discrimination, or simply because life can hurt so much and in so many cruel ways.

The closest I would see to a fully loved world in the future would be AI-driven love, so an ultimately hollow, cold, and fake love instead of the flawed, human one.

I guess love is truly all you need.

[–] picnicolas@slrpnk.net 16 points 5 days ago

I’ve learned to give myself the love I needed through meditation practice, in particular the Ideal Parent Protocol in which you imagine idealized parents loving you just the way you needed but never received. Since doing those practices, along with self love and compassion, I am now able to show up in my relationships with much more compassion and love.

Love is actually infinitely abundant and surrounding us always but trauma closes us off from that reality.

i feel a need to remind you:

[–] tuff_wizard@aussie.zone 94 points 5 days ago (9 children)

Ehhh. If the left is always complaing about the right believing fake news and outrage bait I think we should also resist the temptation to engage in the same thing.

A note a tumblr with a "trust me bro" source should not be considered as true, especially when the contents is a far fetched as this.

[–] SkyezOpen@lemmy.world 38 points 5 days ago (2 children)

Nick fuentes literally dated a catboy. This is not a step further than that.

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 6 points 5 days ago (1 children)

wait who released the prototypes

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[–] alsaaas@lemmy.dbzer0.com 24 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago)

IDK about that specific groyper thing, but homofascism exists and has existed since the very beginning of fascism

[–] homesweethomeMrL@lemmy.world 17 points 5 days ago (2 children)

Fair. So. Who’s looking into this?

[–] if_only@sh.itjust.works 31 points 5 days ago

I tried fact checking this when I first saw it yesterday and haven't been able to verify it. The closest I found was them making homophobic jokes about this subject but no evidence it's practiced.

I think the claim is bogus. If the evidence oop is using is those jokes then the the evidence is very weak.

[–] Godric@lemmy.world 16 points 5 days ago

Being OP, ideally you.

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[–] TankovayaDiviziya@lemmy.world 7 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

The same phenomenon is observed in prisons, and the humiliation ritual of new recruits in some military. It's not gay if you're not the prison bitch or the recruit blowing the commander. As a guy, I never understood this. Just come out! Jeez, the world will be a better place if these raging homophobes start to love themselves.

[–] AllNewTypeFace@leminal.space 7 points 3 days ago

Our glorious catgirls | their barbaric femboys

[–] burntbacon@discuss.tchncs.de 75 points 5 days ago (5 children)

I'm going to need more proof than a tumblr shitpost. There's no way you're going to groom someone who wants to be masculine into being feminine, ala femboys, and especially not to offer themselves to the others.

[–] Voroxpete@sh.itjust.works 37 points 5 days ago (6 children)

I mean, sissy culture is a huge thing. That part I know for a fact. Whether Groypers, specifically, are into this stuff is not something I'm in a position to comment on, but yeah, sissies are big queer subculture.

Basically it's a very fucked up, very right wing tradwife adjacent take on queerness and transness. The thing here is the guys who are getting into this are the kind of guys who, on some level, really do want to embrace their identity as either a queer man, or a trans woman, but have grown up in such a toxic environment that they've never been able to engage with those parts of themselves in a healthy way. So first they try to perform masculinity the way they're supposed to, but it doesn't fix their problems so then they accept this new role as "the sissy", a kind of failure state for performative masculinity that they sort of get bullied into a sort of "Oh no, please don't force me to eat all this chocolate cake" kind of way. By becoming the "victims" of this transformation into enforced womanhood they get to live out their inner desires in a way that's compatible with the societal expectations around them.

Of course, the way these people preform feminity is entirely in line with their completely fucked right wing views on women, so it's this hyper-degrading "Make me a sandwich and then give me a blowjob while I play CoD" male fantasy version of womanhood. That's a big part of what makes this so appealing to hyper-masculine right wing guys; you'll be hard pressed to find anyone more committed to being the perfect right wing male ideal of a woman than another right wing man.

[–] alsaaas@lemmy.dbzer0.com 22 points 5 days ago

You'll be hard pressed to find anyone more committed to being the perfect right wing male ideal of a woman than another right wing man.

Quote worthy shit right here

[–] wide_eyed_stupid@lemmy.world 7 points 5 days ago

This is really interesting.

I mean, fucked up and disturbing, yes, but fascinating.

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[–] Tippon@lemmy.dbzer0.com 37 points 5 days ago

I don't know, there's generations of anecdotal experience from private schools. Even when I was a kid 30+ years ago it was a common thing to hear, that rich schoolboys buggered the younger boys*, who then took their turn when they were older. It was a common joke in media from the 60s and 70s, which would suggest that it was happening in at least the 30s and 40s.

Obviously it is anecdotal, and could have just been the joke spreading, but British and American media made the same observation for a long time.

*They buggered each other, because nobody would be crude enough to suggest sex, and especially not love! These boys were the future of the British Empire don't you know! Stiff upper lip and all that.

[–] fuckwit_mcbumcrumble@lemmy.dbzer0.com 17 points 5 days ago (1 children)

There’s no way you’re going to groom someone who wants to be masculine into being feminine

Who says they actually wanted to be masculine? What if they just wanted to fit in, and that was how they thought they could?

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[–] JackbyDev@programming.dev 8 points 5 days ago (3 children)

So, this isn't really proof or a source, but it's possibly more like grooming people who are closeted trans/non binary (or maybe even before they realize they're closeted). So it could be people that already want to be feminine but aren't really aware of it. So imagine a young amab person who's been bullied into being masculine despite wanting to be feminine. Ending up in such a community would make them a target for this type of grooming.

Just thinking out loud how it might go down. Because I agree, I don't think it'd be easy to just convince someone who wants to be masculine to be feminine.

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[–] captainlezbian@lemmy.world 13 points 4 days ago (1 children)

I don't believe this, but not as much as I'd like to not believe this. That said, as a fascinated nerd, if there is evidence that doesn't require sorting through the toxic sludge of their spaces let me know it sounds fascinating

[–] Dragonstaff@leminal.space 7 points 4 days ago

It sounds like BS because it combines a bit of truth about femboys with salacious fantasy.

Also an "operator" generally means like a Navy Seal.

[–] possumparty@lemmy.blahaj.zone 16 points 4 days ago (1 children)

This shit is pure transphobia perpetuated by 4chan culture to demonize trans people and gender non conforming people. It's synonymous with transmaxxing and incel ideology.

[–] homesweethomeMrL@lemmy.world 8 points 4 days ago (1 children)
[–] captainlezbian@lemmy.world 5 points 4 days ago

Using incel excuses to transition because your brain is toxic sludge but it's feminine toxic sludge.

Actually wait are there transmasc transmaxxers? Or are they all "biological female on testosterone" terfy camp of self destruction

[–] Fandangalo@lemmy.world 50 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago) (3 children)
[–] sudo@programming.dev 29 points 5 days ago (1 children)

How is transmaxxing being used to perpetuate transphobia?

The problem with the “transmaxxing” theory is that it does not contend with the realities of living as a trans woman in a systemically transphobic and misogynistic world. Trans people are subjected to disproportionately higher rates of violence and experience increased levels of housing insecurity in comparison to their peers. Contrary to these statistical realities, Vintologi writes “trans women will benefit from the increasing female privilege.” This supposed privilege has no factual basis as all women are still the subject of discrimination and violence (sexual and otherwise) on the basis of their sex, while being paid an average of 85 cents on the dollar when compared to their cis male counterparts.

Highlighting this section for people.

[–] captainlezbian@lemmy.world 4 points 4 days ago

And it should be noted that trans women in particular face an extreme brunt of it. My life drastically improved by transitioning, but materially it had an immense cost

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[–] Sineljora@sh.itjust.works 12 points 5 days ago (3 children)

Groypers are the domestic terrorists that ended Charlie Kirk

[–] _AutumnMoon_@lemmy.blahaj.zone 6 points 4 days ago (1 children)

I thought they were those little burrowing rodents

[–] ThunderQueen@lemmy.world 4 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Nah, thats Gophers, groypers are the horny babes that stalk musicians

[–] erin@piefed.blahaj.zone 3 points 3 days ago

That would be groupies. Groypers are people that feel up others without consent.

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[–] alsaaas@lemmy.dbzer0.com 11 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Gorki was right /s

Jokes aside, homefascism is a real thing. Also people like Adolf Twinkler exist 🙃

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 16 points 5 days ago

great now i gotta add "adolf twinkler does not exist and cannot hurt you" to my daily affirmations

[–] Formfiller@lemmy.world 6 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago) (3 children)

Holy hell. That’s why we stopped hearing about Tyler Robinson

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[–] MTZ@lemmy.world 12 points 5 days ago

That got really dark, really quick. I also did not know that.

[–] FishFace@piefed.social 11 points 5 days ago (1 children)
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