1 Dumbass = 299 792 458 m/s
Thanks, God. We'll spend the next 3000 years obsessing over that.
this post was submitted on 26 Oct 2025
671 points (99.0% liked)
Science Memes
17182 readers
3245 users here now
Welcome to c/science_memes @ Mander.xyz!
A place for majestic STEMLORD peacocking, as well as memes about the realities of working in a lab.
Rules
- Don't throw mud. Behave like an intellectual and remember the human.
- Keep it rooted (on topic).
- No spam.
- Infographics welcome, get schooled.
This is a science community. We use the Dawkins definition of meme.
Research Committee
Other Mander Communities
Science and Research
Biology and Life Sciences
- !abiogenesis@mander.xyz
- !animal-behavior@mander.xyz
- !anthropology@mander.xyz
- !arachnology@mander.xyz
- !balconygardening@slrpnk.net
- !biodiversity@mander.xyz
- !biology@mander.xyz
- !biophysics@mander.xyz
- !botany@mander.xyz
- !ecology@mander.xyz
- !entomology@mander.xyz
- !fermentation@mander.xyz
- !herpetology@mander.xyz
- !houseplants@mander.xyz
- !medicine@mander.xyz
- !microscopy@mander.xyz
- !mycology@mander.xyz
- !nudibranchs@mander.xyz
- !nutrition@mander.xyz
- !palaeoecology@mander.xyz
- !palaeontology@mander.xyz
- !photosynthesis@mander.xyz
- !plantid@mander.xyz
- !plants@mander.xyz
- !reptiles and amphibians@mander.xyz
Physical Sciences
- !astronomy@mander.xyz
- !chemistry@mander.xyz
- !earthscience@mander.xyz
- !geography@mander.xyz
- !geospatial@mander.xyz
- !nuclear@mander.xyz
- !physics@mander.xyz
- !quantum-computing@mander.xyz
- !spectroscopy@mander.xyz
Humanities and Social Sciences
Practical and Applied Sciences
- !exercise-and sports-science@mander.xyz
- !gardening@mander.xyz
- !self sufficiency@mander.xyz
- !soilscience@slrpnk.net
- !terrariums@mander.xyz
- !timelapse@mander.xyz
Memes
Miscellaneous
founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
that is the linear rate at which dumbassery expands, yes. also light, but that's because as yet tachyons remain hypothetical/fictional and i figure dumbassyons would travel faster than light were it possible.
like how sometimes you can look at someone or something and think "some dumbass is going to do some dumbass shit here soon" even though the dumbassery has not yet begun.
Dumbassion pilot wave theory
Is it "dumbass" (a single word) or is it "dumb/ass" (relation)?
So dumb/ass = c
Multiply both sides by ass.
Dumb = c*ass
Hmmmmmmmm
Fucking knew it, Cassandra!
Both meters and seconds are units of Earth specific measures of space and time. Pretty sure at a cosmic scale god would give fuckall about how we measure and name our shit
Actually most constants have been standardized to natural sources. A meter is now a fixed (small) fraction of the speed of light in vacuum. A second is pegged to the duration of a Cesium isotope spinning or something. Just that the multipliers are chosen to be convenient to us.
Should we need to talk measurements with aliens, we can, and can convert between their units and ours.
Technically a second is an arbitrary measure of a proprty cesium133. Now, anyways
Also "in a vacuum" would be assumed, since almost the entire universe is a vacuum.
i've just figured out how the religious universe ends. some physicist explains to their god that a lot of their assumptions were based on something being in a vacuum, and then their god says "what vacuum? you mean all that sparse hydrogen?" so the physicist says "let's find out what happens when you have a real vacuum" and then the universe ends at the speed of dumbassery.
Ah so THAT'S the resolution to the false vacuum hypothesis
If a god existed and gave a so much of a shit about our masturbatory habits he’d be at least tangentially aware of what the fuck a meter was.
For a second i thought you were calling the metric system masturbatory and then i remembered that christians really do think god watches them jork it. Kinky
load more comments
(1 replies)
People always forget about the rest of the universe. Drives me nuts sometimes
It's neat to think about what units an alien civilization would come up with independently. Like the Plank Distance is fundamental to physics, so they'd probably have something for that.
Degrees Celsius is based on freezing and boiling point of water, so if they came up with a base 10 numbering system and water is key to their biology, then they'd probably come up with that.
A calorie is the energy needed to increase the temperature of 1L of water by 1C. A liter is a volume of a cube 0.1m on each side. The meter was originally ten-millionth of the distance between the equator and north pole (and subsequent redefinitions are based on that original measurement). They wouldn't come up with the meter, and they wouldn't come up with liters or calories, either.
Degrees Celsius is based on freezing and boiling point of water, so if they came up with a base 10 numbering system and water is key to their biology, then they’d probably come up with that.
Waters boiling point isn't a constant though... it's dependent on the atmosphere.
Hell there's also no telling if our preference to base 10 is relative to our number of fingers so neither of those are givens.
Water’s boiling point and freezing point depends on the pressure of the local atmosphere unfortunately! But I like your logic.
Hopefully they'd come up with a better numbering system than base 10. Base 10 is the worst part of metric tbh.
Every base is base 10 dumdum
1, 2, 10, 11, 12, 20, 21...
load more comments
(1 replies)
dumbass is a nice name for a speed unit.
MFW I get a ticket for going 5.374x10^-8^ dumbasses in a 4.633x10^-8^ dumbasses zone
Your rate of dumbassery was too high
load more comments
(6 replies)
There are various systems of units where select physical constants are set to 1. A handy comparison chart is on Wikipedia: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Natural_units?wprov=sfla1
It turns out you can't harmonize all the physical constants. Some will necessarily end up as some non-round number.
Most of them have speed of light = 1, but some have it as 1/α where α is the fine-structure constant (α = e² / 4πε₀ħc ≈ 0.007297)
I understand nothing I've just read but I'm glad you science folk have fun and funding.
load more comments
(2 replies)
view more: next ›