moondoggie

Next stage is some amount of time away from video games.

The stage after that is nostalgia: someone will mention one of the games you loved back in the day and you’ll think “That was when I was happiest. I should find out how to play that again.”

Then you’ll find some way to play it, whether by cobbling together some emulation software or buying some As Seen on TV handheld game that includes your game and a hundred others.

You’ll scratch a little bit of the itch, but decide to start checking out the current video game scene.

Once you realize everything now is too flashy and fast and annoying or it has some dreaded multiplayer requirement that you no longer have enough friends to fulfill and the public rooms of the game are filled with a bunch of children.

Eventually, you’ll stumble into the future’s version of Stardew Valley and be content just building quiet little worlds by yourself.

That still sounds like Andy Dick

“After all, just look at what AI did for me in this photo!”

This is soup for my family!

Do jump scares count as surprises? If so, then frequently.

“Now everyone please turn to document number 43298 in your packet entitled ‘Facts About Your Mother.’”

Well sure, if you don’t take the ferry

The superior way is to eat it like corn on the cob. Start at the pointier end and chew straight back to the mangonus. Don’t forget to smother it in butter after shucking the husk.

And pizza on Fridays

I assume every one of these is just the song “Muskrat Love.”

Yeah, I’ve never seen any of his videos but I know his name when I see his face, know he has a candy bar, and some kind of TV competition on Prime. I’d put him up there as at least the same kind of famous as Kardashians.

At least now I’ll be able to outfit my current American Girl dolls with some proper shoes instead of the current garbage out there.