this post was submitted on 03 Jul 2025
538 points (99.1% liked)

LinkedinLunatics

5045 readers
305 users here now

A place to post ridiculous posts from linkedIn.com

(Full transparency.. a mod for this sub happens to work there.. but that doesn't influence his moderation or laughter at a lot of posts.)

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
 
top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] Blackmist@feddit.uk 23 points 6 days ago (1 children)

So busy she's got time to stage a fake photo from the toilet and make a wishy-washy LinkedIn post about how fucking busy she is.

[–] KingPorkChop@lemmy.ca 3 points 6 days ago

The Temu version of Ferris Bueller's girlfriend could have shit, washed hands, and been back on her laptop on the couch in the time it took to make this bullshit post.

[–] prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone 8 points 6 days ago

Maybe I'm too empathetic, but I just feel bad for people like this.

[–] JoMiran@lemmy.ml 139 points 1 week ago
[–] corroded@lemmy.world 103 points 1 week ago (4 children)

"Start a business" almost certainly means "Buy into an MLM scam."

[–] slaneesh_is_right@lemmy.org 1 points 6 days ago

That's my first thought when i see this. Her own business probably rhymes with schmerba life

[–] The_v@lemmy.world 29 points 1 week ago

Don't forget the standard "Use Mommy and Daddies money to buy an existing small business." Then run it into the ground.

[–] lugal@lemmy.dbzer0.com 6 points 1 week ago

"It's not an MLM when you are at the top"

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] Venus_Ziegenfalle@piefed.social 92 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Please Lord, let this be deranged fetish content rather than whatever the alternative would be. 🙏😔

[–] deadcream@sopuli.xyz 103 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Hustle culture is a deranged fetish.

[–] Venus_Ziegenfalle@piefed.social 19 points 1 week ago

True actually

[–] vikingtons@lemmy.world 65 points 1 week ago (1 children)

...who took the picture? 🧐

[–] The_Picard_Maneuver@lemmy.world 102 points 1 week ago (2 children)
[–] vikingtons@lemmy.world 49 points 1 week ago

what a shit job 😔

[–] Rusty@lemmy.ca 19 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] Th3D3k0y@lemmy.world 6 points 1 week ago

This employee is such a toilet, they are constantly spouting shit.

[–] Evil_Shrubbery@lemmy.zip 57 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

Sets the tripod.
Checks the lightning isn't too good.
Sets the timer.
Fails the first photo bcs pants, laptop, and positioning took too long.
Sets the timer again, this time by waddling to the phone.

"Omg, no, why would you take that picture, don't you see I'm grinding!! You don't get it, we are not the same."

Makes a LinkedIn post.
Adds a shitty pun about shit.

[–] superduperpirate@lemmy.world 42 points 1 week ago (2 children)

There is a time and a place where it is appropriate to post pictures of yourself using the head. It’s called niche pornography on OnlyFans or PornHub, not LinkedIn.

[–] pickman_model@sh.itjust.works 5 points 1 week ago

You know? At my workplace colleagues love talking about the building urinals. Some claim to have been able to make eye contact with people at their desks while refreshing themselves. Maybe that fetish belongs in LinkedIn?

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] RedSnt 32 points 1 week ago (1 children)

This is how you get hemorrhoids.

[–] tordenflesk@lemmy.world 15 points 1 week ago (1 children)

This how you discover you already got them.

[–] taco@piefed.social 14 points 1 week ago

Also how everyone on the Teams call discovers you've got them.

[–] TheFrirish@jlai.lu 28 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

Actual LinkedIn shitpost

[–] kryptonianCodeMonkey@lemmy.world 28 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

pooping photo

just keep pushing through. (No pun intended)

Classy all around. Hope she's on a Teams call with her camera and microphone on and making all of her employees incredibly uncomfortable.

[–] pleasestopasking@reddthat.com 13 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Let's be real "starting a business" probably means she sells essential oils in an MLM

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] Sibbo@sopuli.xyz 22 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] darvocet@infosec.pub 27 points 1 week ago

Its got to be top tier satire.

[–] samus12345@sh.itjust.works 19 points 1 week ago (3 children)

She definitely has shit particles all over that laptop.

[–] onslaught545@lemmy.zip 17 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Shit particles are on basically every surface.

[–] SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world 3 points 6 days ago

It's all about the dosage

[–] SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world 10 points 1 week ago
[–] Bakkoda@sh.itjust.works 6 points 1 week ago

Pink eye is so sexy

[–] fartographer@lemmy.world 19 points 1 week ago

This advice is crap

[–] Empricorn@feddit.nl 19 points 1 week ago

"Hey, you know who we should do business with? That lady who posts pictures of herself taking a shit!"

---Countless future business partners

[–] hansolo@lemmy.today 18 points 1 week ago

This is one of those reasons why I really don't mind the Web 2.0 Walled Garden to some degree.

LinkedIn makes the wall very high, and the people inside the wall are mostly insane like this. That's not a walled garden, that's an asylum.

In Buddhism, we would call it the realm of hungry ghosts, lower than the animal realm (as in base, animalistic desires) and one step above the hell realm. A realm of self-imposed suffering where people can't do anything of merit to burn off karma.

And people like this don't want to leave at all. It's killing them, and they are deluded into "loving" it. Let them stay there. I don't want their illness anywhere I normally enjoy life.

[–] D_C@sh.itjust.works 17 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (2 children)

Look at that face, all wide eyed with a hint of a horny smile. That is a face of a person that's just been caught looking at clown based scat porn ...but is trying to play it off that she is working.
It's a story as old as time!

[–] prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone 7 points 6 days ago

That old chestnut, eh?

[–] Allemaniac@lemmy.world 13 points 1 week ago

ah, the classic

[–] NatakuNox@lemmy.world 14 points 1 week ago (1 children)

All this is probably how she justifies paying her employees below a living wage and resourcing her materials from slave labor. And looking at this dumb persons surroundings. I'd be shocked if she actually worked more than 200 days a year.

[–] DosDude@retrolemmy.com 12 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Honestly. No one should have to work more than 200 days a year. Reality is unfortunately different in a lot of places. But working more is usually not good for your health.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] cheeseburger@lemmy.ca 13 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Looking at this picture still makes me horny. I mean wistful! It makes me wistful!

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] fckreddit@lemmy.ml 12 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Someone needs to learn how to switch off when using toilet.

[–] rob_t_firefly@lemmy.world 1 points 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago)

You're absolutely right, and I sure am writing you this from my office desk where I'm totally using a big desktop computer to read Lemmy and nothing else is happening.

[–] sleepmode@lemmy.world 11 points 1 week ago

Talk about shit posting. Follow her for more unsolicited tips on spreading conjunctivitis, ruining your relationships with a burnout-inducing work ethic, and developing hemorrhoids from too long work shits.

[–] redlegion@sh.itjust.works 10 points 1 week ago

I hate this so much.

[–] altkey@lemmy.dbzer0.com 9 points 1 week ago

Shitposting isn't your job, Meg.

[–] NigelFrobisher@aussie.zone 7 points 1 week ago

Does being a weird little capitalist lickspittle even work on LinkedIn? I see people obviously trying to game the algorithm to gain exposure, including groups of devs sharing basic tips with each other and commenting to amplify, even though you’d think most hiring managers know that devs absolutely don’t go to LinkedIn to learn and share tips.

[–] bstix 5 points 1 week ago

Colonel Shitbucket

[–] Allemaniac@lemmy.world 5 points 1 week ago

cant imagine getting a serious work e-mail from someone currently rappeling one down the white house

load more comments
view more: next ›