this post was submitted on 16 Mar 2025
843 points (98.7% liked)

Programmer Humor

21564 readers
2152 users here now

Welcome to Programmer Humor!

This is a place where you can post jokes, memes, humor, etc. related to programming!

For sharing awful code theres also Programming Horror.

Rules

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
 
top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] WhatYouNeed@lemmy.world 1 points 53 minutes ago

Maybe he left his shed lizard skin on top of the hard drive that caused the overheating?

[–] Harbinger01173430@lemmy.world 36 points 3 hours ago (1 children)

Even a gamer knows that ssdd heat up but never to that level, lol.

What kind of cheap temu ssd does he have in his laptop?

[–] art@lemmy.world 2 points 1 hour ago

He was saving money, you know, to be efficient.

[–] eryndalor@lemm.ee 60 points 5 hours ago (1 children)

60k of rows is nothing. Fuck, where do you find these “geniuses”?

[–] houseofleft@slrpnk.net 14 points 4 hours ago (1 children)

Tbf we don't know how many columns there are /s

[–] Lv_InSaNe_vL@lemmy.world 5 points 2 hours ago

The IRS just switched columns and rows. So there's 60k rows and 330 million columns /s

[–] rumba@lemmy.zip 94 points 11 hours ago (3 children)

Unless I'm misreading it which is possible it's awfully late, he said he processed 60,000 rows didn't find what he was looking for but his hard drive overheated on the full pass.

Discs don't overheat because there was load. Even if he f***** up and didn't index the data correctly (I assume it's a relational database since he's talking about rows) The disc isn't just going to overheat because the job is big. It's going to be lack of air flow or lack of heatsink.

I guarantee you he was running on an external NVMe, and one of those little shitty-ass Chinese enclosures. Or maybe one of those self immolating SanDisk enclosures. Hell, maybe he's on a desktop and he slept a raw NVMe on his motherboard without a heatsink

There are times when you want a brilliant college student on your team, But you need seasoned professionals to help them through the things they've never seen before and never done before.

[–] mckean@programming.dev 7 points 5 hours ago

music theaters also have rows, and they run on sql so logic checks out.

[–] exu@feditown.com 60 points 9 hours ago (3 children)

Can't be a relational database, Musk said the government doesn't use SQL.

[–] rumba@lemmy.zip 12 points 4 hours ago

Lol he also said cybertrucks don't suck ;)

[–] riodoro1@lemmy.world 18 points 8 hours ago (1 children)
[–] el_bhm@lemm.ee 1 points 1 hour ago

Please remember that he is a genius. Only geniuses say a lot of things.

I rest my case.

[–] Lemmist@lemm.ee 2 points 5 hours ago

grep would eat 60k lines without a problem too.

[–] Deathray5@lemmynsfw.com 7 points 7 hours ago

Somehow I feel over clicking without understanding of the consequences sounds like something a techbro would do

[–] BenLeMan@lemmy.world 59 points 12 hours ago

You're not supposed to place your laptop directly in the lap of your fur suit. Always leave an air gap for ventilation, smh.

[–] LillyPip@lemmy.ca 77 points 12 hours ago (1 children)

This cannot be real, wtf. This is cartoon levels of ineptitude.

Or sabotage by someone heading out? Please let this be resistance sabotage they haven’t noticed yet.

[–] turnip@lemm.ee 39 points 12 hours ago* (last edited 12 hours ago) (2 children)

You guys arent running your software off raspberry pi's with sdcards from the gas station?

My allowance is 5$ a month!

[–] Bytemeister@lemmy.world 11 points 3 hours ago

I think my Pi could process 60k rows without overheating. And the poor thing is dangling behind my bookshelf from its power cord with a fine layer of dust coating every inch of it.

[–] LillyPip@lemmy.ca 18 points 12 hours ago

Look, all I’m saying is give Pis a chance.

[–] nonentity@sh.itjust.works 42 points 12 hours ago (1 children)

Either she knows something novel, where processing data using voice coils is somehow beneficial, or is someone who calls their computer a ‘hard drive’, which summarily negates any legitimacy of technical competence.

[–] ZILtoid1991@lemmy.world 16 points 9 hours ago (1 children)

Or wrote the code using AI without checking what it exactly does.

[–] Threeme2189@sh.itjust.works 8 points 9 hours ago

The AI probably used bogosort or something equivalent

[–] DarkSpectrum@lemmy.world 49 points 14 hours ago (1 children)

I will now attempt a full comment ... brace your hard drives

[–] Tungsten5@lemm.ee 7 points 3 hours ago

Bro seriosuly fuck off my phone is overheating now. Thanks

[–] GreenKnight23@lemmy.world 57 points 15 hours ago (1 children)

I smell something, but it's not overheating electronics.

I've processed over 5 million records on a laptop that's almost 10 years old. it took two days to get my results.

there's no way 60,000 records overheated ANYTHING.

[–] wewbull@feddit.uk 21 points 14 hours ago (1 children)

Doesn't actually say that 60k overheated his drive. He says that he ran a run on 60k, and that he couldn't do the whole database due to overheating. Two unrelated statements except that 60k is the lower bound for what he could process.

Doesn't mean he knows what he's doing though, as pretty huge datasets are processable on quite modest hardware if you do it right.

[–] GreenKnight23@lemmy.world 12 points 11 hours ago

that's somehow worse.

a "data analyst" couldn't cut up the work into a parallel processes and run them synchronously? what the actual fuck?

"sorry, I can only do 60k at a time."

just fucking split them up into 6 parallel batch processes running 10k at a time. it's fucking math, not rocket science. I'm not even an analyst and I could fucking do that much.

[–] NigelFrobisher@aussie.zone 15 points 12 hours ago

“I store my records on vinyl. You’ve probably never heard of them.”

[–] jkercher@programming.dev 34 points 14 hours ago (2 children)

60k rows of anything will be pulled into the file cache and do very little work on the drive. Possibly none after the first read.

You can put 60k rows in Excel 95.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] RussianBot8453@lemmy.world 92 points 17 hours ago (8 children)

I'm a data engineer that processes 2 billion row 3000 column datasets every day, and I open shit in Excel with more than 60k rows. What the hell is this chick talking about?

[–] bitjunkie@lemmy.world 1 points 1 hour ago

Diming on her own stupidity without realizing it, like all of them do

load more comments (7 replies)
load more comments
view more: next ›